Operating system

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This simple flowchart will guide through the complex process of choosing an operating system.
This is how OSfags view their operating systems and others.
Nerds will kill you for this.

This is the buggy code that makes your computer work, or not as the case may be. There are three types of operating systems: Good ones, bad ones, and Windows Me. An OS is the base program which hopefully allows people who are not 1337 to make it seem like they know what they are doing, due to the huge amount of help available for modern operating systems. Almost all other programs on your computer require that you are running a certain sort of operating system, for which they have compatibility. Regardless of which operating system you pick, you will have to defend your decision with civilized and intellectual conversation.

  • Linux users are aspies, generally without friends, infrequent bathers and avoid contact with other people.
  • BSD users are autistic introverts who don't like light and avoid eye contact. They also frequently shit themselves and when someone doesn't agree with their solution they throw a tantrum.
  • Mac OS X users are like downies, they run around screaming unintelligibly. Eventually they give up, find a pretty object and masturbate all over it.
  • Plan9 users are like people with multiple personality disorder -- there are many that claim to have it, but only two people truly ever have.
  • Windows users are like people who are bipolar -- common, boring and frequently maniacal, known for their fits of destructive rage and energy.
  • Solaris lovers are those perfectly stable people who fuckup their lives by choosing a really crazy partner with 'potential' who then sucks their mind and pocketbook dry through constant bullshit.
  • IRIX users are like people with sexual disorders - they never get laid.

Makeup Of Operating Systems

Operating systems have a few main parts: the kernel, the filesystem, the user shell or interface, and genitals. The kernel is to an OS what AIDS is to Africa; it is the heart of the system, and is referred to by developers as "Biggie Smalls." The filesystem serves no real purpose in much the same way as homosexuals do. The shell or user interface allows the user to communicate with the kernel, and sometimes even lets you crash your computer.

Examples of Operating Systems


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