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Jessica Lynn Evert

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Jessica Lynn Evert = infected with GOTIS
You can help by not giving her any attention.

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Find an iPod?

This page is about an attempted an hero.


What happens when you mix neglectful parenting with good ol' American values?

Jessica Lynn Evert. Also known as "MessyJessie", "JessicaPDX", "J-Dawg", and "frty777".

Jessica is a horsefaced, titless, STD spreading prostitute from Scappoose, Oregon. Since last Thursday, Jessie has earned a reputation on various internets for being a batshit crazy callgirl.

In August 2012, she became the EDF2 lolcow of the week month. Jessica is known for her ability to go from internet tough guy to whimpering attention whore in two seconds flat, her inability to STFU, and her nudes available to anyone with Google.

She provides the EDF2 community with endless lulz.

In The Beginning

The shitstorm of lulz was sparked by a single intro post some time last Thursday. The post excited the users of EDF2 due to its amount of USI and complete faggotry. Although it has long been a staple of EDF to haze new members in an attempt to weed out those with thin skin, the sheer attention whoring stupidity of Jessie's post made everyone genuinely wish she would GTFO.

The vomit of text below is word for word Messy's intro:

i generate my best ideas from my asshole while sitting on the toilet!! i can spew verbal diarrhea and paint a poo poo Picaso all over the internet. basically my shit don't stink. can you smell it? no. and if you can smell something it is coming from your upper lip after you just went down on your mom.

if you are offended keep reading. some facts about me:

i love animals but i am not a furfag. went to college for veterinary technology.

i like eating but i am not fat.

i am an unemployed felon who is working on getting a life. i love second chances!

lesbian rape is real in the big house. they scissor you till you give up your food they want.

i love to karaoke.

fuck the police.

i love men and sex.

i like funny people.

i live in Portland Oregon and it consistently rains for 8 months.

300 million others wish they had my problems including you, you fucking loser! just kidding:p


—Just Jessie being Jessie

From this post came a response force of a million warm welcomes telling her to shut up, get out, fuck off, show tits, kill herself and make sure no one ever finds the body. Just like 99% of everyone who comes to EDF, she ignored this crapflood and kept posting. Only in this case, they were not kidding.

Shit Gets Real

After this display of faggotry on the intro thread, a jew troll not troll decided that this new user should be looked into a bit more, discovering an interesting revelation. That being that our new friend "messy" was actually a prostitute and a violent felon.

Jessica The Crazy Bitch's Felony Charges


On the date of July 14, 2011, after being promptly dumped by her boyfriend, whom she met as one of her clients as a prostitute for her indecent lifestyle, our blundering anti-hero went on to burn his stash of legal medical weed to the ground as revenge. According to the official police report, after setting the fire she ran away and got a call back from the victim of her crimes. He told her that he wanted to talk about recent events , but in actuality he had called the party van. Upon Jessie's arrival she was promptly V&.

A picture of the destruction Jessie left in her wake.

From this account of the events you could be forgiven for thinking Jessica is fucking stupid, and you would be right! Because that's not all! Contrary to the police report, Jessica told a slightly different story on the forum's shoutbox. Revealing that, after her attempt at arson, her boyfriend decided to choke the bitch. Little did he know that this only made her panties wet, and he was soon rewarded for his attempt to kill her with sex. Meaning he still got one last blowjob out of his ex girlfriend before sending her off to jail.


ThePotShot is a satire site that deals with mocking recently arrested individuals in general, and hookers in particular. Imagine their delight when they realized that one of their favorite article subjects is also a member of their site.

Recognizing Jessica from her recent arrest, they promptly published an article about her, detailing the accounts of her various exploits on the site.

It was soon reveled that Jessica is a whore, and a bad one at that. From the accounts of her and her clients it became apparent that she has type two herpes, which she does not see as something she is obliged to reveal to her customers. In her 4000+ comments on the forum and massive butthurt tantrum on the sites comment section several ex clients exposed that fucking her is like fucking a dead fish. They also found her account on a dating website for people with STD's. Jessica in turn THREATENED TO MURDER SEVERAL OF THE COMMENTERS and acted like the crazy whore that she is, while at the same time still trying to convince people to come pay her money for sex, as if someone would still want her after finding out about her VD's.

The Second Article

But the lulz did not end there. Jessica was so crazy that her actions soon earned her a second article after she CALLED THE WEBSITES OWNER AND LEFT A DEATH THREAT ON HIS ANSWERING MACHINE. According to his own accounts, since her article was published Jessica has been flooding his Emails inbox with crazy shit, sob stories, death threats and naked pictures of herself and her past clients.

This second bout with her also revealed such charming information about her as: Her failed attempt at modeling, claiming to be homeless, telling people that while living on the streets she was forced to shit her pants because she could not find a restroom and an endless supply for forum posts ranging from her detailed plans on how she intends to commit murder to her offering to marry anyone who is nice to her.

After her second insane rampage she was banned from both ThePotShot forum and the other prostitute forum she used to sell her body and eventually found her way to EDF hoping that there her utter faggotry would be welcomed.

Dox Are Dropped

After her articles, nudes and other information was published on the forum Jessie blew a shit fit and deleted her avatar as if that will somehow conceal her identity. But the forum users did not relent, and jumped on this goldmine of lulz, exploiting it to no end Causing "messy" to rage uncontrollably. At some point during the shitstorm she pissed off a leet hacker who dropped her Pastebinfavicon.png dox. Not that finding her dox is particularly hard, because in her stupidity, she is quick to volunteer HER OWN personal information to anyone who asks, in some misguided, CWC-esc attempt to make things better by making them worse. In response, Jessica raged and DEMANDED pictures of her dead grandfather be removed from the forum. And lulz were had by all.

Foiled Again

Despite having every other kind of nude online, no pictures of Jessica's vagoo could be found (found some later anyway), and the EDiots were not satisfied. But Messyjessie was kind enough to send the same person who exposed her on the forum her nudes after he offered to delete her dox. Little did she know that the Jewy overlord of the forum had already done this to another user. Withing moments of sending him her herpes infested vagina, he posted the pictures on the forum. It took her an entire day to realize she could just delete them, but by that time they were already saved.

I guess she really should have lurked moar.

With her dox leaked she did the only thing she could think of: Act like a retard, and threaten legal action.


Learning absolutely nothing for past experiences, she continued to flirt with anyone who made the slightest attempt to pretend to like her. Finally she agreed to strip naked on tinychat and was videotaped doing so. During the conversation she also showed everyone on the chat her bottle of anti crazy pills.

Here are her naked videos:

Gallery Of Nudes

During her stay, an array of pictures were found. Most of which, but not all, feature Jessica stark naked. Here is a collection of them:

Nudes & Whoreshots About missing Pics

Shoops,Edits etc. About missing Pics

And in video form:

MessyJessie being a whore
More whore stupidity

Furthermore, Jessie has admitted that there used to be a lot more naked picture of her across the web that she does not know where they are located or if they are even still up. Happy hunting seems like someone found them and added them to the article.


After endless circle jerking and trolling Jessie decided to quit EDF2 and life forever. Posting a suicide note that many hoped to be her final words:

i think this is good enough reason for me to consider suicide. not just this but horrible things that i have done to others. it makes me sad and weary to ask for help. from the sick childhood abuse i endured to acting out on others in violence. i am really sorry for everything i have done to hurt others and not asking for help before it got bad. i won't go through with it unless i feel this way and i really needed a reason.


— Jessie, threatening to kill herself over words on the internet

It turns out that like most users on the Internet when Jessie quit forever it was a clever lie and likely a ploy for sympathy. The next day she had already recovered from her desire to off herself and attempted to play the suicide letter off as a prank, which did not stop her to repeatedly write more insane rants, proving that she probably meant it but was too much of a pussy to just do it already.

Called In Her Boyfriend

At some point she invited her 32 year old jew boyfriend (Joe D. Anderson) to join her in her fight. Soon it was discovered that birds of a feather flock together and her boyfriend is as retarded and pathetic as her. Within minutes he posted his own nudes and admitted to the following:

  • He suffers from premature ejaculation.
  • He dates Jessica despite knowing she has herpes.
  • He dates Jessica despite knowing she is a prostitute.
  • He dates Jessica despite knowing she has been using the forum to find men to cheat on him with.
  • He let Jessie tie him down and piss on him and thereby infect him with herpes as well.
  • He he doesn't care about any of this because he can't get laid by any girl who is not crazy/a whore/ugly/has a VD/cheats and he is desperate for pussy.

Memorable Jessie Quotes

Everything Jessica says is so amazingly retarded you can't help but laugh. Her debating technique is comprised of lying, denying the obvious truth, telling sob stories, spewing insane rants, acting crazy, daring people to come meet her so she can kill them and then pretending nothing happened and coming back for more abuse.

The sheer volume of this section becomes unbelievable when you realize that all of this is was said by her in less than two weeks in a single forum during the course of little more than 300 posts. 90% of everything she posts is laughably stupid and is quoted here.

sure i cried when i saw this post


— Good luck denying being mad after this.

show me your dick first! pm me! this could be fun.


— This is literally her fourth post.

i will pass


— Regarding posting her tit.

nope. now what? you gonna call your mom? you have excellent social skills! you certaintly didn't listen to anything your mom had to say and so i must hold you responsible. maybe you didn't have a mom but still somehow i am certain she would want the best for you. my experience with men is really been with a bunch of baby back bitches that look up to me on some creepy freudian level. i have a feeling most of you want to fuck your mommy or already have. especially rednecks living in republican states usually practice incest. i am certain you also hate your mom too and she probably is yelling at you right now to clean up your room in the basement. i will finally say that you need a bitch in your life to tell you what to do. so go ahead and yell at me all you want. just remember mommy wants grandchildren and you ain't going to see any womans tits with a mouth like that.


— Her first aspie rant.

wah wah you fucking baby back bitch. you can't handle a woman with her mouth open talking shit can you? you want to know what? i have my insecurities like any other person next to me . what you are trying to do is label my behavior for your comfort. why don't you STFU and have some fun with it. i am here to talk shit, voice my opinion, and if i want to fuck random people from the internet then that would be no concern of yours.


— This bitch will not shut up.

dude i dont care to look around for it. don't be a fucking asshole. i really need to focus on getting a job. if you prevent me from doing that i will be online all the fucking time annoying you and you know you dont want that.


— wat?

actually have horrible ADHD and its untreated because being a unemployed mentally ill individual means that health insurance costs are very high!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i haz none!i am bat shit crazy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bahahahhahahahha!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol!!!!!


She equates having ADHD to an actual handicap.

i like little boys!

i am a gay homo and i love it! will you let me suckkk it daddy? nom nom noh nomh


Trying too hard.

problem is i do have a dirty vag. oh well


pwned. shit happens. i have mental health issues.

i can say that i am my own worst enemy and can only be mad at my own stupidity.


— Just leave.

i am not a snitch. i have dealt with worse dude. your shit doesnt mean anything. i rather fucking kill you and then off myself. what kind of faggot shit would that be if i didn't take a piece of shit like you with me?


— Her first death/suicide threat on EDF.

so how do i get this crap removed and my account deleted please.


— You can't. But you could just... you know... leave.

its not funny at all. its actually really depressing and its not helping me get on with my life. this kind of crap will cause me to have to change my name if i even have a chance to get a job. i live in a horrible place to be homeless during the winter.


— Yet another sob story.

shit you people need to get laid. at least i can make 2 hundred an hour being a whore.


— lol, sure, 200$.

but you are a human being and need to learn when to have some empathy towards others. the fact that you cannot feel how painful this is truly is for me should concern you. the fact that i am mad and able to control it right now takes al lot. honestly you know you do not care but i never did anything to hurt you.


— Trying to cause Troll's Remorse... And failing miserably.

well i am trying to show that most of you are a bunch of sociopaths who probably have hurt others.


— And proud.

go fuck yourself in the neck. honestly all i can think about is mass murder.


— This bitch is crazy.

thats right bitch. you want to meet me? seriously have no problem sitting in prison.


— More of this.

well if anyone lives in portland. for real.


— Even more.

right want an address?


— Yes.

no herpes is common and my doctor said its safe to use a condom with casual sex partners.

if i was in love i tell my partner. but i took the same risks that the men took with me during my escorting days.


— Jessie does not think she needs to warn people that she might infect them with herpes.

usually i can fight off this crap pretty well but i had horrible diarrhea today and not feeling well.


— Wat?

that guy gives out the clap like candy.he will tell you he took care of it and then goes and gives it to you again. he made me sick.


— She has the clap too.

weak little bitch. i could kick your ass. i am strong and athelitc. and no i do not do drugs. you dont know me.


— She will kill us all lol.

you think i talk shit with no game. fuck all of you!!!!!!!!! all of you.



fuck off bitch. look for someone else to try to compare your sad existence with. you don't judge people on the internet. you never have met me. you be done bitch. i teach you a lesson real fast. lol


i have a 108 for an IQ.


— Sure.

i don't even care about what happens with me, but i feel pretty sick to my stomach about my family being mentioned. not cool.

even my ex wanted to talk to me after he put me in jail. probably because he wanted to try and violate my probation which would mean i could not expunge my felony. do not mess with him either. this crap is mine to own and deal with.



oh my god why the fuck would you go after my family like that you sick fuck? who the fuck does that kind of shit? they are innocent people. that crossed a line. i will be warning them.


— Jessie, after being doxed.

i send drunk text messages to Trey Starrs and then i go to bed.


— Still sending nudez and threats to ThePotShot owner.

yes i have ultra herpes. lol


— We know

its a fetish. degrading sex is a turn on . getting pounded in the ass is a turn on for me. having sex with multiple older men is fun when they don't talk shit all the time.


— This explains why she isn't leaving... She's jerking off to this.

because i use a condom. i dont need to tell them. its not illegal besides prostuition.


— Yes you do. Yes it is. And that is not how you spell "Prostitution".

po box 2595 portland oregon


— Posting own dox.



— More... Her provider is cricket.

hey should i shave it or leave it furry for a picture?


— To the same person who made the thread about her on EDF2

great now i have to get to work. what do i get out of this? the thrill of being an attention seeking whore?


— Regarding having to shave her pussy... Obviously that was enough.

well if you suck dick most men will leave their wife for you. you need to be a slut in bed. marriage is based on really damn good sex.


— The girl whore who went to jail for setting her abusive boyfriend's house on fire gives us relationship advice.

you insult my intelligence. i never ever want to experience the hell of being incarcerated. anyone who has been to jail would know what i am talking about.


— >intelligence

please report that post by username "nobody."


— Report rejected.

i dont have money for a lawyer. fuck with me all you want.


— Okay, we will.

you can't feel the pain of life consequences you soulless zombie.

you need someone elses life to bring you closer to it.


— You need to feel full life consequences!!

right....i deleted the url to the images. i still have my photobucket account. did i get it all? if so thank god. HA you fucking cunt!


— Gloating about getting rid of her pussy pics... But it was not so.

stoopid fucking cunt. you have no life. you are an anonymous piece of shit coward.

you really don't pay attention do you. i have no love for trolls like you after i read about the victims of Jason Fortuny. you are flithy nasty ugly fucking loser . your mother should have swallowed that load of sperm. instead the dumb bitch had you.



your the one that is trollling after me about my fuck ups, i cant imagine how your life must be. dumb troll you are what you are and that is a piece of shit. you are proud to call this a troll board. wow that is really something to brag about.

EDF members besides me (don't want your friendship or want to be a member): wow look at me! i am a Troll. ha ha this is a troll board. lets circlejerk all day because it reminds of the faggot that i am.

bitch you are fucking dumb skank ass nasty donkey looking beaner. you eat as much as a troll can be fed. look at what trolling has done to you, you fat nasty donkey. the bigger you are the harder you fall. glad you think herpes has anything to do with the content of my character. and that is the area of life i will lead if i stay with all of you fucking losers.

oh no pizza and naked pics to my family!!!! i am so scared! such childish behavior. wow losers get a life and go fuck yourself!


— So much mad.

BAHAHAHAAAAA. just more of your attempt to prove yourself worthy of anything. so who the fuck are you? you step into portland oregon and you will be really a fool. a fool for even thinking of it in the first place. no afraid of any of you maggots. you have no power but acting out on others with no sense of reality of what your trolling could result in. never said my family wouldn't contact the police. how silly to even make a pizzabusiness waste food for a childish joke. people like you hurt the economy and families. i am rightfully sitting on my ass and taking unemployment benefits that i paid into from taxes.


— Since when do whores pay taxes?

one thing i want to say is that i am disappointed in the human race sometimes and myself most of the time.

i have done some awful things and witnessed it too. i don't like how mean spirited i am on here because i do not know any of you or what backgrounds you come from. hopefully you are all just kids or young adults acting out of boredom. i know i am bored and probably lack motivation because of how disappointed i am with myself. but it always gets better and thats when you can start making fun of it all. its only been one year since i have changed my lifestyle choices but this reminds me of what i was like a year ago. just a really ugly and mean person. so i hope others realize that no matter what you do with my information i am not going to do that to you. i can't back track in my progress and i am done fighting on the interent. its kinda immature and aggressive. the pyschology behind people on this website would be interesting to study. like if people have mental illnesses or come from hard backgrounds.

anyways i am sorry i have said mean things to others. its really not what i want to be like when i am in my 30's.



i feel guilty and believe i deserved this.


— She changed her tune again withing minutes.

on a psychology point of view, i am acting out childhood abuse too. but thats not something i willing to speak to people about.


— Not for long...

i was trying to survive!!!!!! this is what happens when nobody gives a shit. most people live for themselves. i coudln't hold down a job because of anxiety attacks and my meds were fucking with me. i lost my job.

working for doctors in a veterinary hospital was demanding and fast paced.


— ;_;

if i have to continue being a whore to pay for rent i will do so.


— You could just GET A JOB.

i should really use a different handle name and go under a proxy server.


— Too little too late... Maybe if you use 7

really closed minded and judgemental. thank god there is probably only 2- 3 hundred of you in this world that are on this website and act this way.


— Check your numbers.

edf members. forum members. and 12 million is still a small amout considering the fact they are not return users. HIV is rare too. we do have 7 billion people and HIV is like 13 million i think world wide.


— What?

you do pay taxes into unemployment benefits and i am not living off others. besides the food stamps. thats the only one.


— Just wow.

i use to smoke weed all the time. maybe thats why i am lazy.

why can't i just blame others for my problems. its so much easier.


i hate men. especially the men who cheat on their wives. i dont give a fuck.


— The fact they cheat with me is not important.

god i am a horrible person.


— It started to sink in, but not for long.

Jessie: oh my god that was stupid how i just gave him a pic.

Jessie: yeah well you should have listen to the other voices in your head. Jessie: you are right i am wrong.


Jdog:what is doxed? Jdog:its when they get everything they want from your private life and post it for the lulz. they want you to go away.


— Talking to herself.

you are a lying piece of shit who thinks he is a genius for something he never did. i lost respect for you.


— As if he cares.

i like country red neck boys and sometimes jews but not black men.

because i grew up in a small white town full of racists and it was a lifestyle. i dont like black men at all.


— She is also an admitted racist.

god this is horrible. i cant believe how two faced Oddguy is. He truly does care what his internet friends think of him and he will guide me along to page 100. he really disgusts me. don't call my number and go tell me to get the fuck out in the same breath. dont go post pics of my dead grandpa and threaten to pee on it. don't be like every other asshole that takes advantage of a painful situations.

i cant help the fact that i have a disease. i was 20 years old when i got that disease. i was drinking with my friends and we had a much older man help us get the beer. i might have said i was okay with having sex with him but i never said he could not use a condom. i had no idea he didn't use a condom. the next thing i know is a friend tells me that i should talk to his ex wife. i get a hold of his ex wife. she tells me that he gave her herpes during their marriage and that he was bragging how he took my virginity without using a condom. The only reason i got that disease was because of my hymen breaking during sex and it opened a wound for a viral disease to enter.

life kills.


— Notice her telling the person who made the thread about her that she no longer wants to sleep with him.

Baya Rae 4900

well i dont care if you are fat and ugly or neither. I really like nice guys. i will send you butt hole pics if you want.


— This was her reply to the only person on the forum who attempted to stand up for her.

ohh you are sweet heart. my room mate was like that to. gave me support when i needed it. believed in me. if you think you are not attractive at least you know how to make up for it. not all women are attracted to the nice guys. Just like Jenny and Forest Gump. eventually you get noticed.


— She continued by patronizing him and calling him a retard by mistake. At this point he gave up.

i fucking have had tons of unprotected sex with boyfriends. they never got symptoms.


— Infecting your boyfriend is a way of showing love. With clients she wears a condom.

you know for someone who had to put up with my mom i am doing about a 4 out of 10. it wasnt fun being put in front of a freddy kurgur movies and being brain washed at 6 that it was my dad. also the fact that i was told that she has munchausen by proxy which makes sense because i was always sick. she blamed my dad for abusing me sexually and was found to be teaching me all of it. my mom was the abusive one. my father saved me and was rewarded full custody. i have always acted this way since i was a child.


— Blaming everything on child abuse.

At The Moment

Jessie now spends her time endlessly spamming the irc and shoutbox with desperate attempts to fit in with yet another forum that doesn't like her, talking to herself, flirting with the same person who made the thread about her, telling the users her life story, getting called retarded and acting like she doesn't care despite occasionally exploding into fits of rage where she tells everyone on the forum she hates them and dares them to come to her house so she can kill them. Her exploits quickly gained her an entry in QOTN, a fagtag and three EDF "medals", and she is quickly working her way to the EDF2 shitpost hall of fame. There is no foreseeable end to her reign of terror, despite user's asking her to leave. so get use to it

Finally got banned for E-stalking Zaiger and possibly text bombed. Later she was reported to her parole officer for admitting to drinking and prostituting in violation of the terms of her parole, as well as a previous report for tax evasion and we all eagerly reading Oregon local news to see if she had been arrested again yet as a result.

After her ban she cut her hair in a last act of Britney Spears style crazy, and she now stakes out the EDF2 tinychat channel in desperate hope someone will log on (it's empty 99% of the time) and will be willing to talk to her crazy ass.

Did you know?


It appears that Jessica has been deleting her dox from every place they were uploaded. Therefore we have no choice but to upload them here.

Name: Jessica Lynn Evert
Occupation: Prostitute
Age: 25
Hight: 5' 10
Weight: 150lbs
Eye Color: Blue
Conviction: Arson II, booked 7/12/2011
Court Case No: 110732920
DA Case No: 2222207

Phone Number: 503 619 6333
Provider: Cricket

Emails: [email protected] (primary)
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]
[email protected]

Residence: Scappoose, Oregon.
Jessica Lynn Evert does not have a home address, and is assumed to be sucking cock for room and board. Was living with her boyfriend until she was recently dumped.

You can send her mail at:
PO Box 1354
Scappoose, OR 97056

Or you may send mail to her father at:
Bill Evert
33420 SW Sycamore St
Scappoose, OR 97056
Phone Number: (503) 543-0242

Alternate Address:
33051 NW Sandberg Rd
Scappoose, OR 97056

Alternate Address:
Address: 52079 SE 3rd Pl
City: Scappoose
State: OR

Or you may send mail to her other relatives at:

Mary Evert (maiden name Hlavinka)
52079 SE 3rd Pl
Scappoose, OR 97056
(503) 543-2203

You can also contact Mary at work while she helps out with the deli:
Scappoose Senior Center
33342 Meadow Dr
Scappoose, OR 97056
(503) 543-2047

More relatives:
Doug K Evert
215 S 13th st
Saint Helens, OR 97051
(503) 397-2336

Alternate address 1:
184 River St
Saint Helens, OR 97051

Alternative address 2:
1335 2ns St
Columbia City, OR 97018

Occupation: Local 290 Plumbers and Steamlifters
20210 SW Teton Ave, Tualatin, OR 97062
(503) 691-5700

Patricia "Patsy" Evert
51673 Columbia River Hwy
Scappoose, OR 97056
(503) 543-3163

Occupation: John L Scott Real Estate
(503) 543-3163

Other Relatives:

Joseph D Anderson
14715 E Burnside St, Apt 308
Portland, OR 97233-2887
Email: [email protected]

See also


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