|Born||Ian David Karslake Watkins|
30 July 1977
|An hero||No • Surrendered|
|Occupation||Singer / Musician|
|Crime||Babyfuck, CP, Beastiality|
Ian Watkins (aka Ian Wantkids) is a pedophilic, bisexual sheepfucker and former lead-vocalist of hipster outfit Lostprophets. Despite a relatively successful music career Watkins was unable to suppress the demons that lurked deep within his psyche so embarked upon on a prolonged mission to abuse as many children as he could persuade mentally unstable female members of his fanbase to afford him access to. His popularity allowed him to escape justice for some considerable time but in the end his public downfall inevitably came and he was brutally exposed as having conspired with others to insert his penis into the rectum of a 1-year-old boy.
— Ian Watkins, on popular reaction
The Lostprophets were founded in the late 90's, becoming a group of trend-hoppers that played whatever could get them into the mainstream, much like a lost puppy searching for a home. Originally embracing nu metal, by 2004 said genre's popularity was in rapid decline with bands such as Jimmy Eat World, My Chemical Romance and Dashboard Confessional emerging to encourage teenagers to slit their wrists over silly breakups. Lostprophets suddenly embraced emo and went from looking like Limp Bizkit to a bunch of vampiric cosplayers. Lostprophets were also notable for making the same goddamn music video about large groups of teenagers all converging on one spot over and over again. Unable to wake up and smell the coffee, the band didn't disband until Watkins was sentence to prison in 2013.
By around October 2006, Ian Watkins began his venerable crusade, composed principally of introducing infants to his genitalia. At first he attempted to sexually assault a baby boy, but after feeling remorse for giving into his homosexual urges, Ian did what he considered to be normal and raped a baby girl. He first began having sex with teenage fangirls. Ian then conspired with two bitches who made kids themselves to sexually abuse their asses, and Ian sent a message to them saying that if they're his "baby," their babies belong to him as well. He then went on to record kiddie porn for pedophiles to flock off to and cum all over the screen. The investigators also say that he had tried to fuck hundreds of victims until he died of AIDS like Eazy E from NWA.
The pigs went on his cumputer and found kiddy porn and bestiality on his browsing history, allowing them to rain fire and shit thunder all over Ian's britfag ass, dooming him to reside in jail and inevitably drop the soap. In his defense, he is perfectly entitled to be a practitioner of bestiality, owing to his long and storied Welsh heritage.
At first in 2012, Ian Watkins said he wouldn't ever fuck a child or baby, but then like the fags who come out the closet, he admitted it in November 2013. Ian Watkins also says he'll be soon someday a rock god and that he'd rather bite the dust and take a chance to burn in the depths of hell than be in jail with a bunch of faggots for years with an overly obsessed fangirl who had phone sex with him after he got sentenced. He then referred to his abuse as "megalolz" and even used that word for decorations in his hipster band's concerts.
As the police looked at his belongings and shit, they also figured his laptop password which was "ifuckkids", a video of Ian Watkins having sex with a 16-year-old girl then urinating on her like R Kelly and offering her to drink his piss and more, which included:
- The discovery of his profile on Motherless
- A video of his bitch having oral sex with her baby
- A message he made saying how he wants to record some filthy child porn in the summer
- Messages discussing recording bestiality
- A message from his bitch referring to her baby as his "fuck-toy"
Ian Watkins was dutifully remanded to a hardcore prison and is in a cell where he may cohabitate with Mark Bridger, who brutally killed the little, mushy ass head of a 5-year-old girl and hid her in his closet. His two lil' sluts were only sentenced to 14-17 years while he was in for 29 years.
After Ian was sent to the big boy house, his ex-slut Joanne Mjadzelics was now the new Jessi Slaughter, being cyberbullied by butthurt fanboys who said she lied initially to the police about mister Ian the Pedophile and said she wanted to touch her own son in his big
black British cock. She then overdosed on drugs and tried to perform a self-pwnage but failed like Kim Mathers did after she got her white ass owned by Slim Shady. Sorry Ian, but no child or baby wanted to fuck you.
In January 2015, Ms Mjadzelics appeared in court charged with umpteen CP offences. Her defence was that she had all that CP on her computer -- and that she'd made a video of herself having sex with Watkins and speaking graphically about sexually abusing children -- as part of a four-year-long plan to entrap Watkins. Her email kiss-off to Watkins -- "Child molesters till we die" -- was all part of her scheme to bring the bad guy to justice. No, really.
Everybody collectively shat bricks when they heard about Ian's rape adventure, including cunts, his bandmates, fantards, people who flip shit and pray a criminal gets death penalty every time a crime is done and people offended by everything.
Lostprophets banned by HMV
After Ian Watkins finally admitted he sexually abused babies and little kids, HMV removed all their Lostprophets merch and records and got rid of Lostprophets. They said that they were instructed to do it and therefore, did like a deep thinker. Ironically, these guys are still strongly open to selling records by Burzum, Charles Manson and Gary Glitter. Probably because one guy will come slaughter 'em all and paint "HELTER SKELTER" all over the walls, one guy will burn the church the HMV staff attend while they're in there, or another guy will rape them. Despite this, iTunes and other such refused to make this a trend and still would support pedophilia while HMV only supports murder, church burnings and pedophiles (as long as they're old).
In November 2013, once Ian Watkins was convicted of sexual abuse, thousands and thousands of little kids on Facebook shat huge, giant bricks from their worm-infested assholes and at least 5,000 users started flooding the Lostprophets' Facebook page with nerd rage and shat thunder all over the place until you couldn't even reach the first comment on the page since it was made.
—Typical reaction to Ian which came from some girl on Facebook
Several people were deeply offended by this and started nerd raging online about Ian. They then went on to say how they really, really, really wanted to publicly castrate him without anesthetic and then hang him from the nearest lampost and then smile as he writhes in pain. Apparently, because they are always right, You can rape adults, which they want for him in prison, but raping adults is extremely different from raping children and babies. You learn something new everyday.
As the news got out, comments boxes on sites like Blabbermouth.net began to grow and grow as many Christfags came to use the same ol' "I HOPE HE ROTS IN HELL AND GETS SLOWLY CASTRATED WITHOUT ANESTHETIC AND BE BOILED" scream in their comment along with some people who simply just love flocking off to movies of cruel and unusual punishment, only taken to the next level. Basically, this is Sandy Hook all over again, replacing guns with genitalia and murder with sexual abuse.
Fans, I mean trolls
Many fans kept calling Ian "innocent" since they're obviously fans. They then made a Failbook page called "We Support Ian Watkins" and called him their saviour and called him "innocent". As this page was out, many butthurt emo fags were easily offended and dragged their little cocks to the cyberpolice on Failbook and reported it. Pretty soon, the Facebook page was removed and even the Daily News was pissed. Despite that, one said that they called the police and they said it is not illegal to the page due to freedom of speech. But, since websites such as JewTube and Failbook suspend many trolls for even making a joke, the page was removed anyways.
Another Ian Watkins
—JACK (@goring_jack) December 18, 2013 (response from some little kid who is too much of a fucking retard to notice certain things in usernames)
After Ian Wantkids was sentenced to prison in the cell with Mark Bridger, some fat Britfag/businessman from UK whose Twitter username was @ianwatkins was mistaken as the pedophile Ian Watkins and was being cyberbullied by strangers holding candy online.
Another Britfag named Ian H. Watkins who sang for the band Steps was also mistaken as the pedophile Ian Watkins. The court and police even used the Steps frontman's picture to refer to the singer from the Lostprophets.
Lose Yourself (Ian Watkins Version)
24 hours after Ian Watkins' was sentenced to prison for decades, all of a sudden fans started getting tattoos which were tattoos of his conviction photo and the tattoo had "megalolz" below it. On a phone conversation with a fangirl, Ian Watkins said what he did was megalolz and nobody got hurt. Also, 24 hours after he got sentenced to prison, stores like Amazon, eBay and Grindstore began selling his shirts from his company "Made in Hell" which were white shirts that said "MEGALOLZ" on it. Many fans started buying it as the news started to drop the fuck-bomb about it.
As the news began, everyone has been trying to get these shirts banned.
How to troll people who pity the victims
Any of these will make anyone start a hissy fit filled with nerd rage. 100% guaranteed!
- Make a page on Facebook page supporting Ian Watkins
- Say that Ian is innocent
- Still listen to the band and keep buying their merch and albums
- Compliment the Lostprophets
- Call Ian Watkins a hero
- Tell them how they're discriminating against pedophiles
- Say that pedophilia and baby rape is good
- Say that the victims deserved it and that babies and children deserve to be raped
- Call Ian Watkins "funny"
- Show them your megalolz shirt
- Get a megalolz tattoo
- Say you don't know what everyone is so upset about.
- Offer them a megalolz shirt
- Call them a hypocrite if they want him to be fucked anally in prison or if they want him killed. Then point out how murder is even more cruel than rape. Then tell them how they'd have to deal with even that happening to them.
- Make constant rape-jokes
- Make an account on a social network impersonating Ian or the Lostprophets, including on Facebook.
- Tell them they're stuck in old England if they get butthurt enough to scream "DEATH PENALTY DEATH PENALTY!!!111"
- Offer them a kiddy porn tape
- Play "I Wanna Fuck a Dog in the Ass" by Blink-182
- Compliment Dahvie Vanity from Blood on the Dance Floor
- Say that sex is natural for human and thus it is normal to fuck children, even if you aren't a child yourself
- Make lulzy Ian Watkins memes
- Refer to what Ian Watkins did as "megalolz"
- Say that nobody got hurt
- Tell them that you still support Ian because of his music
- Show them this article
- Regina vs Watkins • UK Judiciary
- Lostprophets' Ian Watkins admits sex offences including attempted rape of baby • The Guardian (11/26/13)
- Ian Watkins: The website that proves his perverted child sex abuse was an open secret • Wales Online (01/12/13)
- A fair and balanced reaction • The Daily Sheeple (01/06/14)
- Ian Watkins • Wikipedia
- Lostprophets • Wikipedia
- Ian's Motherless Account, complete with nudes
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