Bumblebee (Movie)

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Bumblebee is another movie in the Transformers franchise, from Michael Bay, that follows the George Lucas formula of explosions, human interaction, aliens, and a half-assed plot set to combine it all into a 2 hour chase to complete a goal.

Following the ComicGate idea of inclusion, this addition to the franchise is written by a Woman and predictably led by a High School–aged Mary Sue character, who has to be better than all the male leads in that she is a Champion diver and a competent mechanic.

Some fans are suggesting that it might be a prequel to the franchise already established by Michael Bay, while others are calling it a reboot to the series, because some cannon doesn't exactly match, and it is more of a homage to the 1980s cartoon and the Transformers comics, with the characters resembling their '80s counterparts rather than looking like the bird-legged robots which populate the original Michael Bay films.


   
 
They literally call themselves Decepticons. That doesn't set off any red flags?
 

 
 

Plot

The plot is the usual unoriginal mix of robots, explosions, and chasing a goal for 2 hours. It is padded with human interaction, 80s music, like Duran Duran, that is so bad it's good, and metaphors that America acts like the Decepticons in that they hide behind Peace Keeping Operations as a way to invade and are actually the Aliens in a foreign land.

Characters

Name Description Picture
Charlie Christina Hodson's Mary Sue in the movie that is pretty, athletic and a competent mechanic to boot. Her one character flaw is that she can't seem to get over her Father's unexpected death that leads her to be an anti-social bitch that can only emotionally bond with a yellow robot at first. Like all good Mary Sues, she sheds her flaws by the end of the movie to attain the perfect shining pretty girl that is inside all girls. Unlike most Mary Sues, she does a good job of forwarding the plot and connecting Bumblebee to her and other characters rather then just being a sex-pot. In fact, the movie does its damndest to keep her from being portrayed as a sexual object in that she is quite stand offish with the boy that has a crush on her, living across the street from her- going so far as having her refuse to hold hands at the end of the movie with him. All in all, she is more robotic than the main character of the movie by following the same routine every day of waking up at 8am to go to work and work on cars in her spare time.

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Bumblebee In case you're Retarded, the titular character of the movie. The movie tries badly to shed his cute, Yellow, kid friendly image from the previous movies and reestablish him as a bad ass. Sent by Optimus Prime, at the fall of Cybertron, to serve as a vanguard and establish a base on Earth while protecting the planet from Decepticons. A killer in this movie, he shuts down 4 decepticunts by himself in Hasbro's hope to make him more than just the guardian of a human, or well behaved robot that will stay in car mode for days on end at the order of his charge. The movie does its best to establish him as having human characteristics such as curiosity, empathy and vengeance to get back at a girl who mocked his ugly, Hitler designed car form and made Charlie cry by reminding her that her daddy is dead. Originally named B-127, he gets his new name of Bumblebee from Charlie because when she found him as a wrecked up piece of shit, in his car mode, he was infested by bees and, Just Because, she thinks he sounds like a bee. Loses his voice after Blitzwing rips out his vocal processor. His VW bug classic form is used to satisfy ancients that crave the 1980s retro look so they can feel good about themselves for a while and maybe forget that they are halfway to the grave. Gets Rickrolled by Charlie when she tries to play a Rick Astley cassette in his cassette player. He quickly rejects it and shoots it at the wall.
Optimus Prime The most amazing Autobot that ever lived and better than you'll ever be because he has a robot girlfriend and never lived in his his mother's basement. If you need proof, just check the name. Mostly in the movie to show off how much better he is than you by kicking the asses of a bunch of Decepticons and to order Bumblebee to go to Earth.
Blitzwing The second Decepticon to be killed by Bumblebee after an unnamed one on Cybertron. There to rip out Bumblebee's vocal processor to shut him up and make him talk using the radio and cassettes when he won't tell Blitzwing Optimus Prime's location. Responsible for shutting Bumblebee down and getting him locked in the Hitler bug until he is later found by Charlie.
Shatter and Dropkick Dropkick is the blue AMC Javelin that also turns into a helicopter while Shatter is the red Plymouth Satellite that can also transform into a jet. The main antagonists of the movie. They are hunting Bumblebee so they can find the location of Optimus Prime and the other Autobots.
Memo The black dude that lives across the street from Charlie and has a crush on her. Walks in to her garage to ask her out on a date and finds a giant robot but doesn't rat her out to Carl Sagan or the FBI because pussy. Completely friend zoned by Charlie at the end of the movie. 250px
Agent Jack Burns The government bad guy of the movie. Sets out to hunt Bumblebee after his unexpected crash during a training mission nearly kills him and other Sector 7 agents. Gives Shatter and Dropkick permission to use U.S. satellites to track Bumblebee because the Decepticons have convinced them to aid them in their hunt, telling Sector 7 that Bumblebee is a dangerous fugitive.
Dr. Powell The geeky scientist that has dreamed his whole life to make contact with an alien species. Because he is so willing to please the aliens/decepticons, he almost hands the Earth over to them by giving them unlimited access to America's satellites and communications.


Plot Holes

  • Why is it that Bumblebee has no memory of Earth when in -The Last Knight' he was fighting Nazis during WWII? He comes to Earth in the 1980s but when Optimus Prime sends him to Earth, he makes no comment about being there before.
  • Nothing is ever said about how Bumblebee ended up in Charlie's Uncle Hank's junkyard.
  • How did Charlie know where Sector 7 and the Decepticons were holding Bumblebee? No one said anything.
  • How can Bumblebee be a prequel when Optimus Prime is on Earth during the 1980s? In the first movie he said he learned English from the internet. Al Gore has yet to invent the internet.
  • A young Agent Simmons is in Sector 7 during Bumblebee, yet he has no memory of him in the first Transformers movie or comments on his change from a VW Bug to a Camaro.
  • How did Bumblebee's music tastes change so fast? In the garage he spits a Smith's cassette out of his radio, at her, because it sucked but later plays it for her as a way to talk.
  • Why didn't Charlie notice that she was being followed by 4 military Hummers before Sector 7 stops her on the road?
  • When Dropkick kills Cliffjumper, he cuts him in two so why does he only shoot Bumblebee when he kills him?
  • Why is there a Sector 7? Nothing is mentioned about Megatron, NBE1, or the Allspark. What alien species caused the U.S. to start the secret agency of Sector 7?

Trolling Bumblebeaners

  • Use the above plot holes to prove that women aren't as capable of being writers as men and if a man wrote it you wouldn't have plot holes that could fit a small solar system.
  • Point out the obvious Mary Sue character of Charlie and say that if a man wrote Bumblebee it would still have a Mary Sue but wouldn't be so obvious because he would have gotten his job through talent and not because he has a vagina.
  • Tell them that if they liked the movie than they are oldfags that just want everything to go retro because they are afraid of dying, after that brag about how young you are.
  • Say that their use of John Cena ruined what could have been a good movie.
  • Tell them John Cena is no Dwayne Johnson.
  • Say that the previous movies, with all their faults were ten times better than Bumblebee.
  • Ask them how this movie fits into The Transformers cannon.
  • Tell them that the movie's bad attempts at humour, such as the "Take me to your leader" line or Bumblebee trying to hide behind a small rock on the beach ruined it for you. You came to see giant robot fights, not a half-assed attempt at comedy that stop you from taking the characters seriously.
  • Say that you are a fan of Cliffjumper then go on to ask why he always has to die.
  • Point out the obvious fact that this movie was only made to satisfy Michael Bay's Bumblebee fetish.

Trailer

Video


See Also

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Bumblebee (Movie)
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