Windows Media Player

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigationJump to search

Windows Media Player is yet another bloated whore piece of software brought to you by the toothless chaps over at Microsoft. Nobody loves Windows Media Player. You can play songs and shit and watch movies and what have you, and is the default pr0n player that has come with every version of windows for the last hundred years. Everybody loves pr0n, nobody loves Windows Media Player. Unfortunately, no video format is known to play on it unless you download additional codecs. It offers an easy to use interface, such as closing the window and getting winamp. Helpfully, WMP organizes all your media for you, but only after waiting hours while it is being added to the built-in library. However, there are several innovative features no other player half its size implements, such as syncing your Ipod, and scrobbling your shitty music to display on your profile.

For some reason, Windows 7 does not support the Windows Media Player toolbar, which was the main reason that most people used WMP.

Short History Of This Piece of Shit

  • WMP 1-5: Lol, don't exist.
  • WMP 6.4: What Media Player Classic is based on. First and last Windows Media Player that wasn't total shit.
  • WMP 7.1: Bloated piece of shit with crap internet hookup features, still much like 6.4 with a shitty skin. Had a beta version they never officially released that was even worse.
  • WMP 8-9: Useless successors. So useless, you could import the Media codecs to the 7.1 version because the 8-9 players were even more bloated with worthless shit otherwise.
  • Every version since just keeps doubling down on the Fail, all you need to know.

External Links

See Also

Softwarez series.jpg

Windows Media Player is part of a series on


Visit the Softwarez Portal for complete coverage.

Windows Media Player
Blue Screen of Death.png
is part of a series on
Digital Media

Adobe® Photoshop®AndroidBlackBerryBlu-rayCompact DiscDesuRadioDRMFairphoneFLACFrapsGimpInternet DVDK-LULZIrfanviewiPhoneiPodiTunesL0deMicrosoft SurfaceMixtapesMKVMP3MS PaintPivot Stickfigure AnimatorQuicktimeRealPlayerReasonSony VegasVLC Media PlayerWindows Movie MakerWindows Media PlayerWMVZune

Waveform whiteblue.png