The Big Bang Theory

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This shitshow is finally ending BAZINGA



With Jews, you lose!

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The funniest man alive
Howard Wolowitz has beautiful child bearing hips!!

The Big Bang Theory, favourite of the scientific community and also known as TBBT or 'LOL I'M SUCH A NERD!! XD' - The TV Show is an unfunny American sitcom written by Chaim Levine, the same douchebag that brought you Two and a Half Men. The show debuted on CBS in 2007 and, unfortunately, doesn't show any signs of ending anytime soon, seeing as it is currently the most popular sitcom since that other cancerous piece of crap Friends, and the show's reruns are so overplayed to death that you want to stab your eyes and ears out with dragon dildos the next time you see them go to Antarctica again.

People think this show is really funny and everyone has heard about it as the 'must-see show' of the decade, and all its awards and such. Figuring you'd get on the bandwagon and see what all the fuss is about, roughly fifteen minutes into the first episode and you will realize it's the worst thing mankind has ever created. Nuclear weapons, handguns, medieval methods of torture, Encyclopedia Dramatica, every other horror spawned from the darkest places of the human psyche are like rays of sugar-coated sunshine compared to this abomination.

Some argue that The IT Crowd, a sitcom with a similar premise from the UK, is superior to The Big Bang Theory, but this is somewhat akin to saying that it's better to have your eyes gouged out than it is to have your kneecaps smashed. Community is also considered to be better than TBBT, but since it's so hard for the majority of Americans to understand its witty and complex humor, not as many people watch it.


The Big Bang Theory is to nerds as minstrel shows are to black people.


—This is what butthurt nerds actually believe.

Apparently Sheldon isn't the only one with a problem.
"Tee hee! Look, Anon! It's you and all your friends!"
Unsurprisingly, this porn parody is actually much funnier than the real thing.

The Big Bang Theory is a show about nerds - or, more specifically, about the stereotypical characterization of the 'nerd' archetype as seen in movies and television shows. From about twenty years ago.

This is likely because if the show were actually about nerds as they are IRL, it'd be considerably harder to market and for audiences to emphathize with a cast of such unlikeable, obnoxious people. The viewing public would, understandably, not want to watch a show about a bunch of fat, unwashed, perverted pizza-faced manchildren with neckbeards, body odor and a penchant for Japanese animated pornography, hence the fact that the entire cast instead embody a 'cute' neutered, marketable form of manufactured nerdiness, all Star Trek references and pocket protectors.

The main characters of The Big Bang Theory are:

  • The Laugh Track - While not really a character per se, the laugh track runs relentlessly enough to be considered a character. Just like every sitcom.
  • Leonard Hofstadter - A beta midget who wears glasses because, y'know, who wears glasses? NERDS!! People believe he's the real main character of the show. He made the terrible mistake of falling in "love" with the slutty, bitchy loser who lives across the hallway and marrying her.
  • Sheldon Cooper - Played by award-winning actor Jim Parsons, Sheldon is the one that that irritating fat girl you work with says reminds her of you. Leonard's best friend, Sheldon is an asexual asspie who seems to enjoy generally being a dick to everybody around him. As is not uncommon for neurotypicals interacting with autistics, none of the other characters seem to like Sheldon, but tolerate his presence because they like Leonard. Every time Sheldon opens his mouth, the studio audience members piss themselves laughing, regardless of whether Sheldon has actually said anything funny. Wears T-shirts with superhero logos on them as part of a product placement deal worked out between DC Comics and the show's producers. And because, y'know, who wears T-shirts with superhero logos on them? NERDS!! Sheldon is basically the poster boy of TBBT, as his smug, revolting expression appears on almost every piece of merchandise associated with the show.
  • Howard Wolowitz - Howard (who appears to have mild treacher collins syndrome) is Leonard and Sheldon's Jewish friend, because every single American movie and TV show ever has to have a Jew in it now or they'll do it again. Like you, Howard lives with his elderly overbearing mother and is unsuccessful with women, until meeting Bernadette. Of all of the main cast, Howard is easily the most rapey. He has a bowl cut because, y'know, what sort of people have that kind of hairstyle? NERDS!!
  • Rajesh Koothrappali - A curry nigger who exists primarily so the writers can make cheap, often borderline racist jokes about the fact that he's from India, something they remind the audience of every five minutes, presumably just in case they forget. Remarkable for being even more beta than Leonard. He gets a hot redheaded girlfriend named Emily who's a dermatologist, but she's actually too young to be one.
  • Penny - Leonard and Sheldon's next-door neighbor that Leonard really wants to bone. Penny exists primarily to serve as fapbait for the show's male audience, despite the fact that she's played by Kaley Cuoco who is, at best, a 6/10. This is probably why despite being a main character, the writers haven't even cared enough to give her a last name. Penny was studying to become an actress, which we can only assume is a euphemism for the fact that she probably sucks cock for a living, given her frequent duckface. However, she quit trying to become another Hollywood puppet and somehow got a job as a pharmaceutical rep, despite her crappy interview skills and lack of knowledge of what she's selling. As if she wasn't ugly enough, she cut her hair short in recent episodes and now she looks like a dyke Miley Cyrus-wannabe. There is some sort of ongoing 'will they?/won't they?' romance subplot going on between her and Leonard, but nobody really gives a fuck. She's the polar opposite of the guys when it comes to intellect and sex because, y'know, who's dumb and slutty? BLONDES!!

And the minor characters are:



TBBT is much beloved by the sort of untalented, tedious and uncreative people who proclaim themselves to be nerds in a misguided and desperate attempt to make themselves seem interesting and/or cool, so it should come as no surprise that a vast majority of its viewers are 16-year-old girls, hipsters and hipster 16-year-old girls.

Much of the humor of the show comes from making references to things that only nerds are interested in, such as science, sci-fi, fantasy, comic books, the Internet and video games, but such references are often lazily researched and sometimes completely inaccurate which causes any real nerds watching to spazz out in uncontrollable tard rage (OMFG, STAR TREK NEMESIS CAME OUT IN 2002, NOT 2003, STUPID FUCKTARDS). Meanwhile, those in the audience who have known the joys of physical love with another person piss themselves laughing because OMG! HE'S PLAYING A NINTENDO 64! LOLZ!!!1 I NEVER PLAYED ONE, BUT VAGUELY REMEMBER THEM!! I'M SUCH A NERD!! XD

Recently, there has been something of a shift of opinion regarding the show's attempts at humor. Now that all the main characters are happily paired up in relationships and much of the show's jokes have shifted topic from superficial nerdy references to the day-to-day dramas of romantic relationships, all the butthurt neckbeards were extremely vocal about their dislike of TBBT's 'lol so nerdy XD' humor, are now demanding that the show return to the status quo that they hated so much, because the depiction of socially awkward individuals with similar niche interests to them maintaining healthy, happy relationships with members of the opposite sex while they remain alone and virginal makes them feel uncomfortable.

The Laugh Track

Like all other sitcoms, The Big Bang Theory is infamous for its highly intrusive and relentless laugh track, not entirely dissimilar to the mirthless laugh of the damned, that it uses to ensure that the viewers at home know exactly when something is funny, as well as to make its pedestrianly written scripts seem funnier than they actually are (oftentimes, having the exact opposite effect). Despite what they and their loyal viewers will say, there never was a live audience, unless you consider the camera crew and studio employees as the live audience.

It has been noticed however, that if the laugh track is removed, the show ceases to be a comedy and instead, turns into a harrowing and compelling drama about the trials of living with autism.

Another example of a angry man describing how unfunny the show is.

The producers believe that, by removing the laugh track, the audience will not know when to laugh and when not to. It is also believed that the audience of TBBT only laughs at the laugh track and putting them in front of a TV with a laugh track playing for many hours will have them laugh for the duration. Unfortunately, this is true.

Penny: "Sheldon? What are you doing?"

Sheldon: "Playing Super Mario on a poorly coded N64 Emulator"

40 second Laugh Track


—Typical (Actual) Big Bang Theory Scene


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Featured article April 13 and 14, 2013
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