|Did You Know:
That Sudan has just been split in two?
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North Sudan is a settlement of Arabs and Niggers in Northern Africa. It was created by a nigger who bred with a sandnigger and they bred a million kids that were half nigger and half sandnigger. It is a founding member of the Axis of Evil Organization, and the Arab League.
While traditionally a society of black person, Sudan has recently diversified into the international charity and hospitality sectors. Its most popular holiday resort,
Darfur (moar like FUNFUR amirite) has drawn enough celebrities that construction has already began on Dar-5. Western and Southern Sudanese suffer from serious lead deficiency. Unlike in zoos, tourists are encouraged to feed the Sudanese with much lead which they can only absorb transdermally.
The creation of a new sovereign shithole has stimulated economic activity in West Africa, for example
The people of Sudan include, the Sudanese Muslims, UN and EU helpers. The Sudanese are constantly being asked to ditch "Islam", which is a wrong, and to embrace democracy. More than half the population is infected with AIDS and HIV, which makes it a popular tourist attraction.
The creation of LOL
It have been told that, the very first LOL was made in Sudan. Scientafricans fully support this theory.
This occured when Gillian Gibbons who caused serious lulz after permitting a Muslim, called "Muhammad", to name a Teddy after himself.
She was originally threatened with 200 lashes, but this was shortened to 199, for Islamic reasons. Then her trial, which was arranged two days after arrest, decided what will happen to her: 15 days in jail. You get murder cases taking longer to get to court.
When asked, Muhammad, the boy who named the teddy, claimed he did it for the lulz.
When Gillian Gibbons returns from her captivity she declared that she will "assist" the British Armed Forces and blow that motherfucking kid back to the prophet... IN HELL!
The government of Sudan, which holds parliament in an Xbox 360 Box, is very odd.
President: Omar Hassan Ahmad al-Bashir (son of Miss Bashir of Westfield CTC)
Born in 1944 into a farming family, Omar al-Bashir joined the army as a young Islamist and rose through the wanks. He fought in the Egyptian Sphincter Army in the 1973 war with Jewland and led the rape against civilians in southern Sudan. This, of course, caused maximum lulz. Omar al-Bashir formed a government of national murder in July 2005 as part of a deal to increase Africa's longest-running civil war, the AIDS War. Military fag, Omar al-Bashir, in mythology led an Islamist-backed coup, but some historians say it was an Islamist-backed soup. He became "Prophet" of Sudan, but the Sudan People's Liberation of Antagonist Muslims (SPLAM), suspended its participation in the government in October 2007, for being a cunt of a wankstein.
SPLAM complained that key elements of the peace deal were being ignored, such as freedom and the right to reproduce (yes, it happens there, they think "Allah" can make more people) and demanded that they be resolved by January 2008. Mr. Bashir promptly stuck his middle finger at them and cummed on their turbans. He then took power in the June 1989 military soup against the elected government of Prime Minister Sadiq al-Mahdi, and forced him into exile. (Mahdi has recently been suspected of "borrowing" Madeline McCann from her parents)
Video: Sudanese law
The judicial system is strict but fair in Sudan. This camwhore was found guilty of violating the tits or GTFO ordinance. When she aggravated the offense by refusing to insert a sharpie into her pooper, the court was forced to take action.
A List of Famous Sudanese people (NOT MUHAMMAD!!!!!!!)
- Mister Bashir
- Miss Bashir
- Muhammad the Teddy (Pedobear's hominus brother, with AIDS)
- Muhammad Jr (Prophet's bent son)
- Alycarn Barmal
- Osama Bin Laden
- British Ruler of Mecca
- Mohamed ibn Zayaf ibn Ali ibn al-Uuzali ibn al-Muhammadi ibn al-Osama
- Muhammad abu Jizzman
Genocides committed by Sudan
- Darfur, where the Sudanese military and its hired gangs of armed bandits are ethnically cleansing the native Christfag black persons, burning their villages, and stealing whatever little property they may own, then forcing the survivors to starve in refugee camps. The goal is to get rid of Christianity and make Darfur a nigger-free zone. Then, to settle Muslim Arabs and their camels in the place of the native inhabitants. Hmm, invading land, destroying its culutre, ethnically cleansing the natives, and resettling a race favorable to the government. sound familiar? One year before the genocide started, the Sudanese Air Force also had a great time when a helicopter shot up a line of starving and skinny refugees as they were preparing to get food and water from the United Nations. Such big, brave men, aren't they? The world is too busy criticizing Israel for its treatment of palestinians to give a shit, though.
- South Sudan, where it was relatively peaceful until sandnigger President Gafaar Nimeiry declared that Islam would rule. This pissed off the Christian Arabs, who formed SPLAM and rebelled. Having its excuse, the Sudanese government sent its military forces to crush the rebellion. They slaughtered 1.9 million people, sold 200,000 as slaves, and stole property. Then, a cease-fire was signed, but the Pedo Muslim government led by Omar al-Bashir continued to dominate.
After years of war, South Sudan managed to gain its independence from Sudan. Being a country full of guns with a militarized population, South Sudan fell into a state of civil war within three years. Out of all the shitholes in Africa, South Sudan is the absolute worst nation in Africa. It is one of the least developed countries in the area and has more crime than fellow shithole country Brazil, which is quite the accomplishment. South Sudan is not worthy of its own article, and will remain a footnote in this one (and in history).
- Sudanese man rapes neighbor's goat,is then forced to marry it. - While heterosexual interspecies passion is legal in Sudan, sick perversions like homosexuality remain illegal.