¡RECONQUISTA!

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Everything inside the red line shows what was once Mexican territory and the green shows high hispanic populations

RECONQUISTA, literally “the reconquering” or “the taking back” in Spanish, is a stoned out of their fucking minds crazy ass Mexican idea that the South West United States can be taken back by Mexico. The idea mostly came about from the dying off of the last good brain cell of an unemployed Illegal Mexican Immigrant as he was smoking Meth and watching Hetalia on Netflix using someone's stolen bandwidth, and had a dream that the Aztec Gods told him that he must take back what was once Aztlan for them. With a true stoner's conviction he pushed the idea thinking it'd make him the Che of the US but forgot about it right after he took a nap. Unfortunately, he told others about it.


Origin

What Mexico's wet dream looks like.

The idea is taken from a period in European History when King Ferdinand V and Queen Isabella defeated the final stronghold of the Moors, officially putting a fist up their ass in January of 1492 and taking back Spain. In this day and age, it is being used as a call to arms by Mexicans to retake The South West, claiming that the US stole it from them through the Annexation of Texas in 1845 and the Mexican Cession of 1848 when Mexico pretty much gave away these lands with the promise that the US would stop kicking its ass.
It is rarely heard about, never spoken of by the Liberal Media because if the word got out that Mexicans weren't jumping the border for Welfare and Medicaid or to drive the rates of pay for entry level positions in fields like carpentry straight down the shitter and were actually militant with the idea of Taking American lands in the name of Mexico then more Americans might begin demanding that Trump get off his ass and get that wall built allready.

They're not teaching their kids to educate themselves and go after a dream. They're teaching them to whine like niggers and accuse the white man of stealing from them

Roconquista In Modern Times

Historically, the idea of Reconquista has been around since the day The United States made Mexico its bitch and Mexico saw the nerd light and signed away its land to stop the wedgies and keep its lunch money. It really didn't start to gain notice until 1917 when a telegraph was intercepted where Germany offered its assistance to Mexico to retake the Southern US if Mexico sided with them during WW1. Like all bad ideas, it was revised again during WW2 when Hitler made the same promise.

Like a rabid dog wagging its tail, they only want to be our friend

In the last ten years the idea of reconquista has become more popular as seen in an article by Elena Poniatowska where she said that "the US sees the Mexican immigrant as a cockroach or flea. I say, let them think of us like this because isn't it the place of both to devour everything they see until they are the monopoly or become the majority population of any place they may be?" Even Mexican President Vicente Fox spoke of reconquista in an interview, "Remember only one thing my Mexican citizens making homes in the US. America succeeded in its colonization of the continent because it refused to change its language. Refused to adopt from other cultures. Claimed to have a vision that was good for all men. Do this my brave soldiers and in a few years you will be back under our flag."

Absolute world 44.jpg

In 2008 the idea of reconquista had become a popular enough concept that the dumb ass Sweedish Jews in charge of Absolut Vodka thought it'd be a great idea to tell the US to go Fuck themselves in their own ass in the hopes of stroking Mexico's ego with a reconquista ad. They were hoping that the beaners would put down the tequila and try their vodka. All that came out of this shit for brains campaign was they accomplished pissing off a lot of people and losing a piece of their market share. Because this happened during the Obama administration, unless you're from the South West, you probably never heard anything about this as it was pretty much swept under the rug.

Reconquista. Why Now?

Here they are in the planning stage


It wasn't until the tech boom of the the late 60s, early 70s that California or any place in the South West United States was someplace people would willingly choose to live. For the most part, California was a place where the rich kept winter homes and the other southwest states like Texas were where the Mutants started the first trailer park at the end of the civil war so they could get drunk, whine like niggers and bitch about how much niggers whine. In fact, many of the big cities in this area got their start from the military. Las Vegas began as a train stop for the military moving personnel west. Seeing the opportunity to take money from dumbass servicemen with too much money in their pockets and no place to spend it, the Jews set up slot machines. San Francisco was a Naval port, and it also got it's famous gay population because it was a city the Navy used to discharge sailors it discovered were gay.
It wasn't until after WW2 when the devil popularized man's greatest sin, air conditioning, that people actually felt that there was more to that area then gay sailors, bad movies and gambling because with AC they found a way to beat the heat.
Many people feel that Reconquista has become popular now because of the boom in wealth in the area maybe even going so far as actually believing that these companies will remain after their revolution and they can share in the wealth. Unfortunately, they are forgetting the Cuban revolution. The Cubans had the same dumbass crazy as shit idea but after their revolution all that stayed were the buildings and they were shit out of luck because rich Jewish investors saw it cheaper to just fuck off to America and Jew it up there via the Wet Feet Dry Feet Policy than have to share their earnings.

See Also

Reconquista
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is part of a series on Donald Trump.


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Featured article September 3 & 4, 2018
Preceded by
Tablecow
Reconquista Succeeded by
TBA