Rational Response Squad

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigationJump to search

This article is TL;DR. You can help by editing this page and removing the large blocks of boring text.
See the style guide for more information.

Button tldr.jpg
Info non-talk.png BREAKING NEWS:
Logo of the Rational Response Squad.

When epic idiocy met Internet atheism, the Rational Response SquadFedora icon.png was born. The Rational Response Squad, or RRS, are a cult of butthurt demagogic evangelical atheists and wannabe grassroots attention whores activists. Their goal is to use negative tactics, sexual gimmicks, and idiotic memes to ram their inane ideological propaganda down everyone's throat. They set out to accomplish this by getting their ass handed to them on radio shows nobody listens to, making YouTube videos, maintaining a user-surly unsearchable website consisting of eight active members and your mom, as well as broadcasting internet radio shows in a private webcam chatroom. They are revolutionaries! However, as of 2008, they have retreated into stasis and cower from any public debate or confrontation not on their own web site.They are known to aggressively patrol their Blasphemy Challenge entries on YouTube and give negative comment points to anyone that disagrees with them. Obviously, an excellent source to troll. This is done so they can exercise their authority to censor dissenting opinion of anything deemed unfavorable. Ironically, with these characteristics, as well as their desperate attempts to provoke religious people into an extreme rage to validate their own fragile egos, they have become the mirror image of everything they profess to dislike. They are irrational.

The Rational Response Squad

My OCD is going to help save the planet!!!


The not in any way deluded Brian Sapient discussing himself on his RRS forums

Info non-talk.png Is this rational?
  • Brian Sapient, the cult leader of the Rational Response Squad, would admit his mom to a mental hospital for believing in God if a hospital would take her.
  • While religious people are out getting drunk and porking some lass in the loo, the Rational Response Squad atheists are busy reading the Bible, and preparing to debate hung over Christians.
  • While your average churchie attends once a week and donates 10% of their income, the average "Rational Responder" spends 7 days a week and most of their income on their crusade.
  • Rook Hawkins speaks in New York in front of NYC Atheists, claims Jesus never existed because the Bible is crap.
  • Greydon Square released "The Cpt Theorem" on Soundclick. Some proceeds may be used to pay for punching Brian Sapient in the face.
  • The Rational Response Squad do not appear publicly without armed security.
The Rational Response Squad proudly showing off their "patrol car" on their website.

The Rational Response Squad's extreme hatred towards people who believe in imaginary sky daddies is very irrational, most of it being a fairly clear expression of a desperate need for validation through rabidly hypocritical behavior. Also ironically, in their quest to "disprove" God, they have become moar dogmatic in their belief system than any theist.

The RRS claim to have "rich and powerful" financial backers (PayPal and Brian's mom) that have enabled them to live in a house together where they constantly wear their own RRS-branded t-shirts and spend 24 hours a day on Stickam and YouTube "speading the word about atheism." While this is typical of cult behavior, it is currently unknown whether or not the group is harvesting firearms. Will hopefully go out in style.

Despite having "rich and powerful financial backers," Brian Sapient claims to only make $5,000/year. They presently use ChipIn and managed to con members into donating $560 as of November 2007. Presently they are advertising on Google Ads but keeping the details secret. "We are worried about sabotage from the fine folks who would like us to remain silent." However actively targeting Christian sites makes such security moot.

Using Google Ads, the RRS expects to attract "highly intelligent people as well from varying areas from psychology, biology, evolution, cosmology, physics, and more." But anyone with a basic background in history understands their ultimate goal of classifying all religious belief as a mental disorder has been tried by other totalitarian states and has led to huge violations of human rights. They presently only attract idiots too susceptible to the mob mentality, and always will.

Merry Christmas RRS from RnR, ED, and Dawkins

They like to claim that over 50 theists have become atheists because of the Rational Response Squad. Yet they have been unable to provide any proof of this.They have claimed to sue Uri Geller when he falsely DMCA'd one of their YouTube videos, when in fact they probably just filed a standard counter notice.

Internet media whores

Like all good wannabe internet media whores RRS created an advertisement on Wikipedia which was promptly deleted only to be reinstated three months later after a dedicated campaign and sexual favors produced a passing mention in a Newsweek article and one mention in a Fox News blog.

One Wikipedian, a college friend of Brian Sapient and former member, stated that "the RRS is blatantly biased, and incapable of understanding this bias by lacking the ability to discern between fact and opinion. It is a feat, to say the least, that this group is more criticized among atheists and "freethinkers," (including me) than among the religious themselves."

The RRS actively targets "young people" to perform acts which create controversy and raise awareness on their behalf. The most famous is The Blasphemy Challenge. Lesser known was their poorly conceived idea Burning Burqa Challenge. Core member Kelly's Tits expressed willingness to take the challenge but was discouraged by Brian's fear of retaliation and the idea of having sex with her severed head. Such a good example of their cultural intolerance, and disregard to the safety of their followers, they have since removed their videos related to the Burqa Challenge.

FreethinkingTeens - for 30 something pervs

Fyre86/Nikki86 These fridge magnets were sold after she turned 18. Yay! -

Like any good treehouse cult, the RRS has a number of front groups. Among them is Freethinking Teens. According to the RRS, "young people are the most vulnerable to religious indoctrination, we feel it is important to reach them."[5] Reach them, and tell these "free thinkers" what to think. He reaches them by convincing them they are the largest most hated minority[6], Rook Hawkins' soft porn [7] (ample moaning and warm breadth [sic]), and the Blasphemy Challenge.

You have to wonder about thirty-something adolescents shaping young minds. According to Rayven Alandria [8] Brian Sapient bought then 17-year-old Nikki/Fyre86 a webcam in exchange for her masturbating in their Stickam channel[9] sometime before February 2007 [10]. But according to Nikki's Myspace and YouTube profile she is 20-years-old, born April 17th, 1988. So anyone who bought a Freethinkingteens refrigerator magnet, the odds are damn good that Nikki's tits were 18 at the time. According to sources, she loves lube.[11]

No one to date has backed up Rayven Alandria's story. But there is every reason to believe if you are 18-years-old and have nice tits, you might be selected to show off your goodies for Freethinkingteens.com and RationalResponders.com, and might get a free webcam to boot. There is no evidence to support the claim that they are anything but regular internet pervs.

Nikki now spends her time not in school helping Rook, Sapient, and Tomcat with the newest project, the RRS Academy where they claim to teach college level courses, just without those pesky degrees or letters after their names. Don't bother with anything like MIT's free online course-ware, RRS classes are taught by a real Jesus Mythicist!

Darth_Josh, the 30-something pervert who made teen fridge magnets.

Update: RRS sychophant Darth_Josh verified that the Nikki masturbation episode did indeed happen.

Originally Posted by IGExpandingPanda
Righto, here is where I honestly get confused.
At first I thought this was Darth_Josh, but it's sounding much like Brian fucking Cutler.
This is likely why he's getting defensive about the 17 year old remark. At some point, usually about 20 to 23 you have to figure out that YOUR the adult. I don't know for a fact if he got Frye to masturbate, but I've pretty much established that she was 18 turning 19 at the time, and so long as she's not lying about her age, this is at least legal, well, save any minors who were in skype at the time, which actually I don't know the rules on this.

In replying to the post, Darth_Josh claims that the Nikki masturbation RRS show happened "a long time ago".

Originally Posted by render (AKA Darth_Josh)
Nope. It's me. darth In the cyber flesh. Too bad you'll never get the real story. It wasn't even skype.
That has to suck. It was also a LONG time ago. You'd think she would have called the cops or 'to catch a predator' by now.

The only thing that can be verified is Nikki's age at the time of the incident. She claimed to be 17-years-old when it happened, although her Myspace page would put her at 18-years-old at the time. It's claimed that there were at least two young 13 to 15-year-old boys in the Stickam chat room at the time, but they have not come forward to verify this claim. Suffice to say, whether Nikki was 17 or 18-years-old, it's pretty clear that Brian Sapient likes to take advantage of immature young girls and get them to play porn star for the cameras. Interesting, since we now know his girlfriend Kelly is a licensed prostitute in Nevada and sex webcam girl.

In summary, the RRS aren't a bunch of pervs using their cult status to prey on young girls, naaaah, they are here to save us from the mind disorder called theism!

Financial – The RRS is freedom from getting a damn job

The RRS claimed to be on the verge of filing for non-profit status, and in the mean time, anyone wishing to donate more than $1,000 can e-mail Sapient for instructions on how to subvert the IRS by donating to a charity which would give them money. However, in April 2007 an "anonymous investor" helped Sapient buy a $340,000 house. Had he filed as a non-profit, he wouldn't enjoy the benefits of such a generous gift. His new claim is he wants to remain anonymous so Christians won't go after him, but it's more likely he wants to avoid transparent accounting associated with a non-profit organization.

The RRS generates income in the following ways:

  1. Subscriptions Bronze - $3, Silver - $10, Gold - $25 monthly
  2. T-shirt & Media sales
  3. Referrals – Google ads, Amazon, Evolve Fish
  4. General donations
  5. Pooled donations Hosting/Server & Advertising
  6. Subverted funds through legit non profit organizations
  7. Room Rental

Sapient claims donations over $1,000 can be processed though a non-profit organization who "will use the money to pay their portion of the server fees." The Freethought Society of Greater Philadelphia has been informed of their vile attempt to deceive the public and the IRS reportedly has no such arrangement with the RRS. It's presently unknown what sucker will co-operate with Brian Sapient's questionable business practices.

If you would like to make a donation of over $1,000 we can arrange for you to pay directly to a non-profit organization (tax deductible) who will use the money to pay their portion of the server fees. Contact Sapient to make such an arrangement.


  • It's rumored that Brian Sapient has NO fear of the IRS
  • They freely admit to embezzling funds

Presuming they only had 200 subscribers at the bronze level, 1% of the number of members they claim to have, that would be $7,200. Their hosting expenses have increased from $75/year to presently $1,300/year to handle a message board that has an average of 120 messages a day. Even taking the cost of the server, claimed to be $2,600, that still leaves $3,300 to spare. Brian Sapient estimated the site pulled in $55,000, roughly 10% of the Freedom From Religion Foundation's gross.

None of their subscriptions go toward hosting their website.

Instead Sapient wants an extra $11,600 for a site that gets an average of 120 messages/day. This will cover another server costing $3,000, another host costing another $800/month. Why? Kelly's Tits explains, "You are making such a fuss about the money when it's clear that we don't make enough for me or Rook to stop working and for Brian to not take money out of his personal savings." So by their own admission they want to quit their day jobs and be full time activists.

While "an anonymous investor" shelled out $204,000 for the $340,000 house, Sapient owns a 39% share of the house dedicated for the RRS enterprise. A 1% share was sold to Rook Hawkin's bimbo, one Lori K9sByte. It's not an issue of standards, she's just clinically brain dead, see photoFile:RRS-Lori-K9sByte-dog.jpg.

Kelly's Tits thinks people should just take it on faith that the money goes where she says it goes. Wut? Isn't faith irrational?

Kelly's Tits offers her opinion on those who question the organization's finical management:

  • Sapient whines about getting $17,000 out of savings, when an anonymous investor shelled out $204,000 for his fucking house.
  • The RRS wants YOU to pay their way through life, plus an extra $11,600 to support their hobby.
  • They want both the benefits of a non profit & a commercial business. I.E. free labor and all the bucks in their pocket.
  • Their supporters are such morons they don't know they are funding a poor business plan.

Prominent Rational Response Squad members

The core members of the Rational Response Squad consist of Brian Sapient, Kelly, and Rook Hawkins. Outside their treehouse cult they are better known as the slacker retard, the stripper skank, and the wannabe.

Brian Sapient

If you voted for Bush please don't request my friendship. You don't pass the minimum intelligence requirement to converse with me. I'm not a rocket scientist, but 90 IQ's laugh at how undereducated and mis/underinformed Bush voters are.


—Brian Sapient, being rational and tolerant and forgetting he is a huge Christopher Hitchens fanboi

Kelly O'Connor aka Kellym78

KellyM78 - RRS's Resident Concubine and only real reason to bother watching RRS videos. Note the massive scar under her right tit.
  • Is the science consultant. Unlike other RRS fucktards, Kelly's Tits actually went to college, but dropped out. In true RRS fashion, she has no real credentials, but once aspired to go back to school and get a pretend advanced degree in psychology and philosophy.
  • Was a butthurt evangelical Christian, and is now a butthurt evangelical atheist.
  • According to Brian Sapient, "was so in love with Jesus that she read three separate versions of the Bible in full, was looked at by her pastor as a star and by the people in her church as a heroic figure".
  • Has three children, and custody of none, but is most proud of her fake tits; "the babies I love the most."
  • Is so self-absorbed she spends her time seeing how many neck beards Google her tits.
  • Was Brian Sappient's concubine, and has now declared open relationship status because Brian Sapient prefers sloppy seconds.
  • It is arguable that Brian Sapient is an atheist so he can enjoy a tit-fuck guilt-free.
  • Was employed as a stripper at "Bada Bing" specializing in lap dances. [13] (Note that the real-life Bada Bing is actually just some shit-hole off route 17.)
  • Is apparently ashamed of her God given body, since she no longer acknowledges having made tit-fuck porn. Is so proud of her new career she called her mom and bragged about being a prostitute, "I called my mom and said, 'Guess what? I'm an official prostitute!'"[14]
  • Has made pr0n (watch her in action here[15]), and works as a licensed prostitute under the pseudonym Kasey Grant
  • Was fired from the Moonlight Bunny Ranch for turning off clients with her pencil face, and subsequently found work at Sheri's Ranch] in Pahrump, NV from Feburary 23, 2009 through to March 3, 2009. [16]

I'm not a huge fan of anal, but I'll do it for enough money [[17]]


—Kelly on being a rational role model for her children

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Rook Hawkins

Rook being pwnd by the Christfag Frank Walton of the blog Atheism Sucks! [3]
Rook jumps on couches for mythical Jesus?
  • According to Brian Sapient, "..was studying to be a pastor, and after seeing the light from the sun shining on a sign at school, thought that God was calling him". Given he was STUDYING to be a pastor 6 years ago, and he's now 24, obviously his studies are limited to the high-school level.
  • Like Brian Sapient, ironically commits the fallacy fallacy often when trying to cock-pwn people and Jews.
  • Always incorrectly uses "ad hock" as a verb [18] when he's been pwned and/or feels butthurt.
  • Likes to debate biblical history with his high-school background with people actually fluent in Latin, Koine Greek, Syriac-Aramaic despite only being semi-literate in English.
  • Has NO ability to do original research, so at best he's a commentator. He bases his facts purely on 19th century freethinkers[19]. Has possibly plagiarised[20] the work of Dennis McKinsey[21] and posted it on atheistnetwork[22]. Later claimed to be a completion not plagiarism, it still lacks adequate acknowledgment except "Thanks to Dennis McKinsey (who let me steal his work and make me look like a real historian).
  • Retreats back to his tree house cult and claims victory when real academics no longer can stand his 24-year-old temper tantrums.
  • Claims to have a 5 digit income, the only core RRS member to do so. WOW!
  • Has currently cut ties with the RRS, "I no longer participate in RRS and haven't for some time."[23] In favor of being a sycophant for the Jebus Truthers Project.

I'm sure you are aware that if this goes were not to be handled appropriately, and I took this to court and had to sopoena Google for the ip addresses (and discovered that they were different), after you had been told that this was going on, you could be held responsible for not taking action which could result in a lawsuit.


—Rook's latest abomination of the English language

The authors of written literature in antiquity, such as the Gospel accounts, were not incompetents, or even the uneducated.[24]


—Rook's latest abomination of the English language

Funny how all three have symptoms exhibiting "Grandiose Delusional Disorder"; they probably have some a chemical imbalance which would explain their cult membership and megalomania.

Less than prominent Rational Response Squad cult members

Lori K9sByte - Rook Hawkins' plaything


  • Is their holy prophet they pray to[25].
  • It's claimed by the RRS that prayers to Jake, "return a 51% better response rate then to any god! Guaranteed [sic]!"
  • These stupid fuckers stole that bit from a George Carlin routine in which he claims to pray to Joe Pesci with a 50% success rate.

Mike (Yellow#5)

  • Is responsible for opening suspicious packages, showing us once again Brian's disregard for member's safety. [26]

Greydon Square

  • Is the edgy hip-hop rapper who was duped into doing the music for the RRS based on the lie they had 20,000 members.
  • Is a self proclaimed "black Carl Sagan," yet only attends Mesa Community College.[27]
  • Is the only member confirmed to have firearms.
  • Once kicked the shit out of Brian Sapient. See below.

It's not known if their lesser members actually have jobs.

Insignificant douche bags

Matt Shizzle granulated middle of his class at Lulztown PA

Lori K9sByte

  • Shares a bed with Rook, and was stupid enough to invest $3,400 in Sapient's freedom from work enterprise.
  • Was put in charge of Shipping Greydon Square CDs, but didn't bother.
  • Tried to make some porn with Rook[28] but his penis was too small.

Matt Shizzle

  • Has a BA in Psychology from Lulztown PA
  • Is a superfan and idiot troll.
  • Was kicked out of the cult after his credit card was maxed out and could no longer donate.
  • Is bitter about losing his cult membership because he is still in love with Kelly's Tits.

The "theism is a mental disorder" claim

Recently, the RRS posted a video to promote their long-standing campaign to have theists categorized as having a "Grandiose Delusional Disorder" (Changing scientific definitions to promote your own agenda? Now where have I heard that before?) added to the DSM (The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) based on 16 points: Interestingly enough, RRS exhibits all of these symptoms.

  • The patient expresses an idea or belief with unusual persistence or force.
  • That idea appears to exert an undue influence on his or her life, and the way of life is altered to an inexplicable extent.
  • Despite his profound conviction, there is often a quality of secretiveness or suspicion when the patient is questioned about it.
  • The individual tends to be humorless and oversensitive, especially about the belief.
  • There is a quality of centrality; no matter how unlikely it is that these strange things are happening to him, the patient accepts them relatively unquestioningly.
  • An attempt to contradict the belief is likely to arouse an inappropriately strong emotional reaction, often with irritability and hostility.
  • The belief is, at the least, unlikely.
  • The patient is emotionally over-invested in the idea and overwhelms other elements of his psyche.
  • The delusion, if acted out, often leads to behaviors that are abnormal and/or out of character, although perhaps understandable in the light of the delusion.
  • Individuals who know the patient will observe that his belief and behavior are uncharacteristic and alien.

Why "theism is a mental disorder" is retarded

Not only was this theory plaigarized from Albert Ellis, the fact that atheism can also be construed as a delusional disorder based on a generalized non-specific list of behaviors escapes them. "The patient expresses an idea or belief with unusual persistence or force." Sound familiar?

The Retarded Response Squad supported this claim by saying that they were backed up by a bunch of psychologists. One of these was the big titted concubine of Brian Sapient, KellyM78, who had (according to Sapient) "understood read some books about psychology" and was "in no way a biased agendaist [sic]".

Rather than admitting there is no support for their Quixotic crusade, they feel that somehow they are ahead of the curve and will get religion classified as a mental disorder in the DSM-5 or 6.

Supporting their claim using work that has already been rejected by the author

RRS cited Dr Albert Ellis as support for their theory that "Theism is a Mental Disorder".Dr Albert Ellis's essay they use to support this position was later discredited by none other than Dr Albert Ellis himself in a subsequent essay in which he stated the glaringly obvious fact that only the really crazy evangelical rapture believing hell and damnation creationists could be in any way described as having unhealthy delusions.

The Richard Dawkins Foundation distancing themselves from the RRS

January 4th 2008, according to Reed Braden of the blog Unorthodox Atheism and the podcast "Two Smokin' Hot Freethinkers," your friendly neighborhood pan troglodytic boobs -- Brian Sapient and Kelly's Tits decided to join five other atheists in a conference call where they tried to start a rumor that Richard Dawkins himself was having an affair with a member of the new management staff.

Why attack their lord? Reed explains the new managements at the Richard Dawkins Foundation (RDF) got annoyed with the RRS, "riding the coattails of Professor Dawkins into pseudo-stardom," and took steps to distance themselves from the self-proclaimed king and queen of atheism. When pressed for proof the RRS claimed it was confidential. Interestingly enough, just before Reed's blog was published the RRS pulled all pictures on their website that showed themselves and Richard Dawkins together, as well as all YouTube videos of Richard Dawkins in their hotel room.

Brian Sapient's response was, "I get the feeling you are a christian of some sort masquerading. I will likely file suit against you in the future. As it's only gonna become a bigger story." So in short, the RDF takes steps to cut the imaginary connection to the RRS, Brian Sapient and Kelly's Tits start a rumor about Richard Dawkins to get someone fired, someone blogs their transparent attempt at retaliation, and Brian Sapient resorts to the usual bullying tactics and emotional appeals failing to realize had he just dropped it in Skype there wouldn't be anything to blog about.


Once, among a crowd of sheep and with the blessings of Brian Sapient, I went on the Internet and spoke: "I deny the Holy Spirit." Now, I'm proud to say: "I hung up on Brian Sapient."


Reed Braden of Unorthodox Atheism

RRS vs RD.net - Who's #1?

Since being cock blocked from the Richard Dawkins website, Brian Sapient has been on a crusade to prove their website is better. To this end he's been actively getting users of this site to download the Alexa tool bar. Kelly's Tits explains the two day drop in their ratings was a result of the RRS being black listed from Alexa, a matter which was "resolved." Since their campaign began, they managed to overtake RichardDawkins.net in page views, but not reach, making the end ranking suspicious to say the least. When asked Kelly's Tits responds, "I'm done with this retarded conversation. Thread closed."

Between February 21, 2008 and March 23, 2008, the RRS's three month Alexa average somehow managed to climb above RichardDawkins.net in ratings, a fact they were so very proud of, or rather something they spammed everywhere to show advertisers to get money. However, it was the height of hubris to make this claim when trying to compare your self to a site which has maintained the higher Alexa rank for over a year with some short term spikes in use, but not unique users. But still, a very insignificant site (#24,134 21-Feb-2008) managed to overtake another insignificant site (RichardDawkins.net - #23,882), and keep a higher average for thirty-one days. As of March 23rd, 2008 they are back to being second rate douche bags.

The truth is what you should tell your cult members, that you were number one for a short time and now you and your site are going down the toilet because of your asshattery, self promotion, and simply ridiculous claims concerning yourselves (e.g. Rook Hawkins -- lol)



RRS e-mail posted - Sapient acts irrationally, goes apeshit, calls police

Brian Sapient, in an act of true rationality, phoned the Borough of Hatboro, PA police 28 Feb 2008 (215-675-2832) department when a user reposted a private e-mail and claimed harassment and copyright violations. Officer Valloway phoned at 2:17am about some “website postings”.[29]

From: [email protected]
To: my hotmail address that I never use
Sent: Tuesday, February 26, 2008 4:31 PM
Subject: Go fuck yourself cunt
A letter from all of us at RRS...
Go fuck yourself. We see you in public, and we'll let everyone in the room know about your baggage. Bitch.
Your fucking scum. So glad none of the atheist groups want you back. Idiot.

What the |friendly neighborhood pan troglodytic boobs don't seem to understand is:

  1. E-mails are not copyrightable, unless they are a "creative work"
  2. If this was copyrightable, then quoting it for critical review meets fair use guidelines
  3. If this was a copyright violation, it would be a civil matter, not a criminal one
  4. The e-mail in question is threatening a person to cease and desist under the threat of further personal harassment.

Other than showing a lack of understanding of basic grammar and copyright law, Sapient shows us once again that the Rational Response Squad is about as interested in free speech as the Church of Scientology.

Paranoid Sapient won't participate in Anonymous CoS protests

The Rational Response Squad supports Scientology.

While the official position of the RRS is that the church of Scientology is just as irrational as any other religion, we've seen a lack of support regarding protests on the church of Scientology. This leaked e-mail explains why

:From: sapient
:To: EverLastingGodStopper @ (hotmail address I never use)
:Sent: Sunday, February 10, 2008 8:08 AM
:Subject: Re: Sunday Feb 10. Philly demo
:I just wanted to let you know I happen to think "anonymous" is a detriment to society. It would take me too long to explain. The easiest explanation...if you've ever seen the movie Idiocracy, a world in which we promote "anonymous" will turn in to the world of Idiocracy not too far down the road. Further, your children and my children are likely to be verbally and mentally abused by the kids in anonymous. They are people who find happiness when delivering physical or mental pain to others, for the most part they are all young. I've seen them responsible for the suicides of several people who couldn't withstand the mental anguish that "anonymous" followers put them through, and the reaction from "anonymous" is: LULZ.

:I beg you to look into them a little more.
:They are the people that run and congregate at: www.encyclopediadramatica.com, www.711chan.org, www.411chan.org, and also that partyvan site.
:In Rationality,
:Brian Sapient

  • It's rumored that Sapient checks under his bed for Anonymous members targeting him.
  • They advertise for Scientology on their website File:RRSsupportsScientology.jpg

Greydon Square squarely punches Sapient in face

For Darwin! :(

The blog Tea Pot Atheist reports that in an epic moment of bi-polar bear power-lulz, Greydon Square AKA the self-proclaimed "black Carl Sagan"[30] punched Brian Sapient in the face many times.

It seems the heart of this dispute is over CD sales. Brian Sapient saw a chance to make a 1000% profit and gain music rights to his videos, but would take people's money and not give them a product. Further, the price of his album at "$11.99 via physical distribution on his homepage"[31] but without his knowledge or consent upped the price to $15, making Greydon Square look like a fraud.

On top of this, Brian Sapient took money as an agent of Greydon Square, guaranteed shipping in seven days[32], kept the money and shipped nothing, making it look like a poor attempt at wire and postal fraud. An unpaid flunky was blamed. When asked to stop sales of the CD until this dispute was resolved by a neutral arbitrator, Sapient refused claiming ownership over Greydon Square's copyrighted work and had yet to make back his investment. It was at this point Greydon Square punched Brian Sapient in the face.

Kelly's Tits were reported as saying, "it was a violent savage animalistic assault by a low-life thug who put shame on the atheist community." She also wonders why Brian Sapient isn't getting any sympathy, and can't understand why anyone would be upset by seemingly valid accusations of embezzlement, wire fraud, mail fraud, and price fraud or someone attempting to exercise their copyright. She is also reported to have large titz. A table was also toppled in this exchange.

Greydon Square takes shit from no one, if you don't get your CD, he gets angry. Operators are standing by[4], some proceeds used to keep the lead singer out of jail.

While many douche bags would like to ban Greydon Square from future conferences, he will still perform at The Atheist Experience[33] June 20th 2008. Learn about how the belief in God is not logical, and how it's more logical to spend your life obsessed over the lack of belief in something. Brian Sapient was unavailable for comment whether he'll face the "Black Carl Sagan" in the ring again.

We here at Encyclopedia Dramatica would like to say we are sorry for the altercation. Brian Sapient generates much lulz. Get well soon you stupid self-aggrandizing son-of-a-bitch so we can laugh at you. HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS ...But seriously, we hope you've developed a few more neuroses and mental scars from your ordeal, you retarded asshat.

Greydon Square offers an apology

Brian Sapient offers defamationand more defamation

Discuss this issue on | RichardDawkins.net, | Rants 'n Raves, | Internet Infidels

Rook Hawkins' legal threats - "Sopoena" Google for the IP addresses

Rook Hawkins and books

Do you remember being a child in a school yard? You were butthurt over dropping your lollipop and proudly shouted, "I'm going to sue your mom." Do you remember growing out of that phase? Rook Hawkins doesn't. Recently on Rantsnraves.org there is a thread spoofing Rook[34]. Rook took some tips from Sapient's book How To Threaten Lawsuits and Get Your Way, and e-mailed the administrator. Rook claims some experience: "I'm sure you are aware that if this goes were not to be handled appropriately, and I took this to court and had to sopoena [sic] Google for the IP addresses (and discovered that they were different)."[35]. A vote was taken to address the seriousness of Rooks "legal" claim[36]. Presently 92.86% vote to call Rook's bluff, about the percent of lawyers to users on Rantsnraves. Brian Sapient[37] and Matt Shizzle[38] have been spoofed.

It's reported that the posters are behind seven proxies and it would take lots of luck and a Google Sopoena [sic] to catch them. Also while lawyers as a rule can't spell subpoena, an "expert" in mythology who can't spell subpoena[39] is an epic fail.

Rook Hawkins speaks to NYC Atheists - described as "scholarly"

Rook Hawkins is the Squad's resident expert on "Ancient texts" and biblical shit was invited to speak to NYC-Atheists, a small fringe atheist cult known to frequent Kennedy's Irish Restaurant. Their press agent, Jane Everhart, overly excited about a boy over half her age didn't bother to check Rook's credentials as she knew he was a work in progress. She made the following claims

  1. Rook Hawkins was a self-taught expert on the Bible, a public historian[40], and bible specialist[41].
  2. Translated the ENTIRE bible from Greek.
  3. and was invited to publish academic series.

Jane Everhart is a independent journalist, freelance editor[42], and prolific spammer of private listservs[43] who can't grasp that a press release is for the press and shouldn't be large enough to choke a horse and be sent to every e-mail she runs across. Rook Hawkins might not even be a high-school graduate, is totally unpublished, and writes on the 10th grade level. But Jane, lacking in any journalistic integrity, spammed the world with her mammoth 96 line press release with laudable claims that don't pass the sniff test. She claims to be totally inundated by 6 e-mails from two people over a week informing her that Rook is a fraud.


So no atheist would ever dispute an unpublished uncredentialed douche bag that claims he can prove there was no Jesus, constructed a conspiracy theory where people are paid by the Vatican to discredit a person's thesis that can be summed up like this, "The bible is crap, so there was no Jesus, 'cause there is no reason to believe there was". One critic perpetrated some epic lulz by faxing the restaurant Rook was speaking at[44] [45] which resulted in a huge panic attack by Jane. It's reported she was looking under the tables for Vatican Commandos while they spent an hour figuring out the sound system. One attendee Roy Pertchik felt, "somewhat abused by the talk; assailed[46]" which is no surprise as Rook mumbled quickly a bunch of foreign sounding names for an hour to establish the bible is crap. Positive reviews describe him as being "very scholarly" but when asked what Rook talked about, they had no fucking clue but it sure sounded scholarly.

Rook's detractors [47][48] were never hiding, they are most public in two threads with over 1,800 replies. His position has been thoroughly debunked by TeamFFI[49][50] among others. Only one person bothered to bring up the debate, suggesting there is no reason to believe there was no Jesus just because the bible is crap, to which Rook responded "there is no reason to think he did". Rook feels pretty good as he's the sort of boy who gets validation by getting negative attention. Jane Everhart gets her validation by doing stupid shit and blaming criticism on evil fanatic Christians when ALL THE CRITICS WERE WELL KNOWN ATHEISTS.

Why NYC Atheists is a stupid pseudo-cult

This was after pages of comments were deleted, but her distaste of censorship continued for exactly 16 hours where every comment critical of Rook declaring him self an expert or Jane fraudulently promoting Rook as, among other things, the guy who translated the bible from Greek by age 25, where deleted but printed to PDFs by a critic.[51].

Jane on censorship
Jane Everhart
Rook on lecture
Moar Rook role-playing

So the bottom line:

  1. Jane uncritically accepted Rook's claims and blew up his profile;
  2. She refused to listen to valid queries about how she was presenting him;
  3. Displayed extreme paranoia about Rook's critics, even accepting his lie that we were theists;
  4. Exaggerated about the number of people critical of their advert, and their motivation
  5. Made vicious allegations regarding child-molestation;
  6. Lied about harassment;
  7. Cried Vatican Conspiracy and the group subsequently edited/deleted and banned contributions and contributors to the debate[52].

This begs the question, if we have a fanatical believer becoming a fanatical nonbeliever, what the fuck is the difference. In short, NYC Atheists is commanded by megalomaniacal demagogues who claim to embrace reason, but use emotion to guide people to their ultimate purpose, a world free of Christians. The only difference is religion is better organized. As a result of this epic lulz NYC Atheists is now #2 on Rant n' Raves cult watch list.

Why Rook Hawkins' position is crap

The bible isn't just crap, it's built on crap, built from crap. Over centuries there were many people on soap boxes spewing crap. Someone wrote down this crap, and in the fourth century someone assembled the biggest pile of crap in history. In order for Rook's position to work, the bible must be designed for a purpose, not just a bunch of random crap. Bottom line - anyone who uses crap to prove the existence of someone who spewed crap, you get crap. Once you accept the bible is crap, you can move on, unless your a narcissistic douche bag with something to prove.

Learn Moar | RichardDawkins.net - "What Rook is Not, | Rants 'n Raves - "Continuing the 'Dialogue' Rook Hawkins", | NYC Atheist censored message boards, | Some shitty blog with links to censored comments"

Kellym78 Is Dead

On October 6, 2009 Brian Sapient posted Rumors about me answered on facebook, on The Rational Response Squad web site,

Rumors about me answered on facebook

Hey folks, if you have facebook you might want to check my profile over the last few days. I've spoken about Kelly and I breaking up for good about 3 weeks ago, and have recently started a dialogue addressing any rumors that people might have been convinced of over the last few years. Generally when a claim was ridiculous I would ignore it as I deemed it as too stupid to respond to, however Rook persuaded me via phone tonight to answer my friends on any rumors that they were curious about. I started the conversation on facebook because I wanted to see what actual fan/friends want to know about as opposed to the enemy types who just want to ruffle feathers. A few questions were in fact asked, and I was rather thorough. If the conversation continues well there, I'll likely post the relevant rumor answers on this site soon.

Here's the thread: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?&new_box_added_id=2448182852#/note.php?note_id=170805010311&ref=mf

If you want to find me on facebook, look up "Brian Sapient" and send me a friend request.

If you're still pushing RRS, I love you.

Two days later, Kelly responded on her website in a post titled Kellym78 Is Dead,

Kellym78 Is Dead
Written by Kasey Grant Thursday, 08 October 2009 05:11

There's a lot of people in this world who would prefer to gloss over the ugliness of life than to acknowledge its existence. It is apparently happening right now on Facebook.This is what I have to say about that--try being real for ONCE. Tell people about how I had a nervous breakdown last year after being drugged and raped, then had an abortion, then had you threatening to leave from that very day (so sensitive), and stopped writing because I went to rehab for 45 days. Then tell them how you won't let me come home even though my insurance can't get me into what YOU consider appropriate treatment--and FUCK what I think or feel about it.

I hope you meet your next girlfriend on fucking Facebook, take her home, and then realize why men pay to fuck me. And then she'll leave you, too, because we all have daddies, and if we wanted to live with them, we would.

THAT IS TRUTH. And I'm sorry it came to that. The Kellym78 accounts on RRS, MySpace, and Facebook have all been permanently deleted, and fuck if I didn't wish I could delete it from my brain as well.

Keep on coming back to KaseyGrant.com--your never-ending source of drama. I'm not even drunk-posting this time.

In summation, Brian Sapient could not sexually satisfy Kelly, so there was no point financially supporting him. Kelly is now back on the market to the delight of Matt Shizzle. And it is only a matter of time now before both Brian Sapient and Kelly become Christfags once again.

Notable quotes

Don't you just love the internet? Just two minutes on Google and I found this. You're a shitstain Brian, you are a God damned liar, and a dangerous demagogue. I can't wait until the rest of the people who are deluded enough to consider themselves followers wake the fuck up and smell the fucking coffee. And realise what a pathetic piece of shit you are.



I love that you mention theism as being an unhealthy preoccupation... what do you spend all your time doing, Sapient?



Notable videos

YouTube Favicon.png Brian Sapient is a petty, megalomaniacal demagogue by FakeSagan

YouTube Favicon.png Ever seen atheist RRS rap? It makes Christian rock look good.


External Links


[Close them downOpen the records]
Rational Response Squad is part of a series on Cults
UFO Cults: ScientologyGalactic Federation of LightHeaven's GateRaeliansNibiru
New-age Faggotry:

WiccaThe DolmenMooniesPaganismBlack AlchemyFagnosticismPrem RawatVoluntary Human Extinction MovementThothRon Paul

Raep cults: SatanismManson FamilyMasonsAl Qaeda
Jesus Cults: Ex-GayWestboro Baptist ChurchMormonismBranch DavidiansPeople's TempleChick Tracts
Wannabe Cults: SephyismSonic CulTVampiresGothsFurriesMulderiteWooksBroniesLibertariansFeminismSJWs
Stupid Cults: ScientologyAtheismBreatharianMichelle Belanger/House KheperuSonic PassionHighgate Vampire, theThe Tenacious Unicorn Ranch
Troll Cults: AnonymousCult of the Dead CowRaptor JesusJohn SolomonChurch of the SubGeniusDiscordianism
Web 2.0 Cults: Atheist Scum UnitedRational Response SquadWikipediaYoung Tubers UnitedRationalWikiKony 2012Kiwi Farms
Portal icon whores.gif

Rational Response Squad is part of a series on


Visit the Whores Portal for complete coverage.

JewTube Logo.png

Rational Response Squad is part of a series on YouTube.



Visit the YouTube Portal

A Message From Chad and SteveA hunter shoots a bearAaronEverettLandAbsenceOfTheAbsentAddison MikkelsonAdeleADoseOfBuckleyAeverine NievesAfr0blu3Afro NinjaAgoraphobic-BlueAJcomixAkai DaliaAkaichouAkewsticRockRAleksandr PistoletovAlex Mae MuhollandAlexander4488Alexander4488/Approved ED PageAlexander4488/Director CommentaryAlexandercarneiroAlex MacRaeAlix HenriolAlphawerewolffAlyallieAmazingplatypus69Amber ButtrumAmerica's Third PartyAngelofthyNightAngry GrandpaAngry Homo KidAngry JoeAngry Video Game NerdAngryLittleGiriAniMatAnonymousNastyAnonymousThoughtAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAnthonytoneyAnti-Flagger Association of YouTubeAntiDisneyMovementAntoine DodsonApplemilk1988AquagirlwhitefoxArceusfan2013Ardi RizalArgent009Armake21Armoured SkepticAsalieriAshlea ClaytonASMRAstablaziaAtJap13Atheist Scum UnitedAtheneAttackofthehankAudreynolandAush0kAustin FullmerAutoplayAxelswife1Aydin PaladinAyumihamiltonB WalmerBaaaBags of MoneyBananaphoneBANGSBarefoot NatureBarmer479Bart the GeneralBattimBattle For Dream IslandBee MovieBeebee890BenthelooneyBerdBetabyteiphoneBigBadFurgyTheFoxBikerfoxBill122460Billoon45BLACKB0NDBLACKbusterCriticBlasphemy ChallengeBleedingFireWolfBloodraptorBludshot the HedgehogBlueshineWolfBlunty3000Bob RehahnBodrochowskiBodyXPoliticBoh3m3BoxxyBrandon SmithBravesgirl5BreakBrett KeaneBrian MuellerBrittany VentiBrokeTheInterwebBroncofn90BrookersBurger the Angry CatBURKBus Uncle

CaddicarusCakefartsCallumCartelCansin13CapnOAwesomeCaptainAtheistCaramelldansenCarl FiadinoCartoonjunkieCash MasterCassiusPlejarenAlienChad "Atheist Killa" ElliottChad HurleyChadwardennChancepsychChangeDaChannelCharlestrippyCharlie Bit Me - Again!Cheeseburger JoshCheetawolfChekovsgunCheryl ShumanChismahChloe DykstraChosonNinjaChrissy ChambersChris CrockerChris-chan/VideosChristianHillbillyChuggaaconroyCid SilverwingCid and Conners Excellent AdventureCircaRigelCirnoClay ClaymoreClayranger89CodenamesailorearthCodenamesailorearth/2nd Wikia SagaCodenamesailorearth/2nd Wikia Saga/BlacklistCodenamesailorearth/ED SagaCodenamesailorearth/The BeginningCokeman2423Colleen ThomasCondom SnortingCooking With Jack ShowCopperCabCorey MargeraCoughlan666Crazy GideonCrazyvideosandrantsCriss AngelCRoadwarriorCropperbCrossmackCrunkcoreCrystal ShinkleCubbyCulexorCulexor/YouTubeCuntFuckBitchCupcake DogCutechongCutiePieMarziaCwilliams1976CyanterroristDaddyOFiveDaHaloChickDamaronDamien EstreichDan144xDandCVideosDangermanDanielspengiesDarknessthecurseDarksidered992DarkspeedsDarksydePhilDarkzero63DashieGamesDavid After DentistDavid HockeyDavidsfarmDaxFlameDbootsthedivaDcigsDear SisterDeleting Your YouTube VideosDemcadDenalynnnDerek JeevesDerpaviangottDev-catscratchDigibronyDigitalSurgeonDiGiTiLsOuLDiaper BoyDie AntwoordDiogo "Doggis" MendesDips Tobacco RedneckDJ KEEMSTARDLAbaoaquDodgerofZionDog264Donnie DaviesDouble RainbowDoubleSAnimationsDownfallDr. OctogonapusDr. TranDr4g0nK1dDraconas RayneDrewtoothpasteDrinkingwithbobDrossRotzankDrp1zzaDylan KimberlinDynaCatlovesme

Sailormoonred1Sam PepperSammyClassicSonicFanSandro L JeanSanjaya/JSargon of AkkadSaturnDOSSaturnine FilmsSave AaliyahScarredFurrySchool Bus FightScott DeiCasScottHermanFitnessSegacampSerialKillaCSesshReincarnatedSeto-Kaiba.comSetsuna ToushirouShane DawsonShane LeeSharolaidShaycarlSherry ShrinerShockOfGodShocked and Appalled CatShoe0nHeadShon TerryShoobySimply OkamiSimply SaraSindragonSirius OrionisSittin On Tha ToiletSkueeSKWEEZYSleepykinqSmell Yo DickSmogon UniversitySmorekitty97SmpfilmsSnackyCakes2008SnowVhiteSokiTwopawSonadowclubSonic X BloopersSony VegasSONYFANBOYSoulbrothanumbuh3SpaghettiosSparkalloonSparkling WigglesSpax3SpeakoniaSSSniperWolfStarlaglamSteAndKelStealth CatSteve ChenStu makes chocolate pudding at 4 in the morningSuperMarioLoganSuper Planet DolanSusan BoyleSwitchiedaggerSxephilSynchtubeTabbyTablecowTaekesiTails DollTakedownmanTakeShotActionTamias the ChipmunkTammyToeTana MongeauTay ZondayTay Zonday/CRLyricsTechaTedjesuschristgodTeenage Tourettes CampTehbigtoasterTerror PlaylistTh3RoyismThat Guy With The GlassesThatKidDouglasThatkidparkerThdrksideThe Annoying OrangeThe Barney BunchThe CaseyThe DickridersThe Domino's YouTube IncidentThe Failkips Strikes BackThe Fine BrosThe Florida Tweenie RapistsThe Harlan ShowThe Kewl KidsThe Incredible Flying Broomstick GuyThe MoleThe Mulberry EightThe NutshackThe Online GamerThe Rebel MediaThe Slow Mo GuysThe Spoony ExperimentThe Spoony Experiment/Spoony and FriendsThe TrashmanThe Troll HunterThe Unknown AutobotThe Young TurksTheAmazingAtheistTheArchfiendTheAtheistGamerThedramatubeTheHill88ThemaskedanalystTheMrXshowTheMysteriousMrEnterThenintendo3ds2TheQuestionMarkManThe rEactorTherealagerbonTheRedSkullTheresa ShellerTheSockDetectiveTheSuperRobotSoujaOGTheTruthHurtsNetworkThewinekoneThink B4 You SpeakThree Wolf MoonThunderf00tTime MagazineTimmygalTimmysmommy01TinaecmusicTina S.TL;DWToby J RathjenTolstoyKafkaEvskyTom SersonTommy JordanTommy SotomayorTommypezmasterTonettaTonetta777Tony48219TonystockertToonKriticY2KTori BelliachiTotalbiscuitTourette's GuyTrevor RiegerTrey Eric SeslerTriciakittyTrickshottingTriggerfoxTrollsNewsTrollsOfTerrorTrololoTroyriserTruthfulChristianTsimFuckisTunakTurtle PunchTwilightSucksTwizidwickedletteTwiztidAshTwo Girls One FingerTyler GarmanyTyler Redick TheVeganStudent

Rational Response Squad
is part of a series on
Gods & Methodology [-+]
High Priests [-+]
Denominations & Organizations [-+]
Followers [-+]
Sheeple & Heresies [-+]
Accessories & Related Concepts [-+]
Featured article December 11, 2007
Preceded by
Rational Response Squad Succeeded by
Penis Nosed Fox

Written mainly by Kasey Grant Thursday, 08 October 2009 05:11