Otaku emoticons

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Japanese smileys are interesting in the way that Otaku (Please note that Otaku aren't white and that these emoticons are only used by weeaboos, google 2ch emoticons) regularly use them in an attempt to make their emoticons look more kawaii, and thus deserve a punch in the fucking face. Unfortunately, one cannot punch an Otaku in the face across the internets; therefore, we are resorted to trolling for the lulz.

Here is a list of Otaku emoticons:

^O^User is experiencing an orgasm
^_^User is looking up at the sky, waiting for a pile of shit to land on their forehead.
(())3=8)User is imitating an African. There are no black people on the Internet.
-_-Person using this smiley is most likely taking it up the ass, which results in a grotesque facial contortion.
o_OParis Hilton. Beware of my fucked up eye; it's bigger than the other.
O_OSame as above, except having 2 fucked up eyes.
^.^Looks almost like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, but Otaku don't believe in Christmas, so who the fuck knows?
x_xOtaku just drank poison, hopefully.
^_~Just recently had cum splattered in their eye, so they're trying to wink out the burning sensation.
;_;Supposed to resemble a crying emoticon, but it looks more like a fuckin' four-eyed extraterrestrial.
>_<Victim of trolling. Lulz ensue.
n_nRainbows for eyes are supposed to represent an Otaku's pride in being a faggot.
T_TTelephone poles were shoved into their eyesockets.
^v^O RLY???!!!!
^o^Represents an Otaku's willingness to perform fellatio.
^=^Furry smiley. Stay the fuck away if you value your anus and/or pets.

Seemingly innocuous shorthand for the following series of deep-throating emoticons.

._.Represents the reaction of coming across a big cock and being ready to accept it in any orifice.
>.>Someone shifting their eyes, attempting to find a cock to suck. If used repeatedly, said someone has failed to find a suitable cock.
(``){0.0}(``)This piece of shit is a bear. Yes, it's a bear. It has 2 claws and a big ugly anime motherfuckin' face.
\_d(O.O)b_/This is a WTF reaction. It only manifests when the person using it cannot find a cock anywhere. Noone thinks this is funny.
(>^_^)>User is a fatty and dancing. "Fatty" can be inferred because they are on the internets.
User is experiencing surprise buttsex.
〒_〒User has discovered more about Japan than animu, mangos and pocky, and is crying because they will have to purchase two tickets to Japan to accommodate their girth... which they can't afford because they used up so much money on animu, mangos and pocky.
の_のUser is unsure of a translation, because it isn't one of the three Japanese phrases they know.
=_=The unholy lovechild of the -_- face and that atrocious cocknazi catface. Otaku think it makes them look cool, but like the above it's just a 4 eyed piece of anime shit, with a fucking line for a mouth.
<3The average size of a weeaboo's penis in inches.

BTW, if you use any of these, you should be shot and your family should be raped ^_^.

See also

Otaku emoticons is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
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