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This faggot waits for the child to make the first move in a sexual situation.
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I believe that what you say online, should follow you in real life. You shouldn't just... get away with it.


—Dohoho... We'll keep you honest, Onision

Note the discomfort in Shane Dawson's face as Onision comes in.
Well thought out reply.
Confirmed ArchiveToday-favicon.pnggay
Twinky with AIDS bobblehead. "Don't want them to see my bewbs, teehee!"
Nice self projection, Gruck
Cugly's channel is dying.

YouTube Favicon.png Onision, also known as Gregory James Daniel a.k.a Gruck la Duck or Gregory James Jackson Gregory James Avarde, is a YouTuber born with ovaries instead of testicles. This makes him curl his eyelashes and put on light makeup, and has male GOTIS=like syndrome. He is famous for the drama he makes, and his train-wreck of a love life. He publicly broadcasts personal information about his life like one loveable Autistic Hero We all know and love. He resides in Tacoma, Washington, where his pastime is physically, mentally, and verbally abusing his girlfriends when he isn't busy creating YouTube videos, ranting about "haters", and how he wants his "privacy". If you comment on his videos with even a semblance of legitimate criticism, he may block you, in which case you are a winrar; if he flips his shit and gets racist on you, you win one free internetz. He believes that the following deserve to die: Omnivores and Carnivores, people who smoke, drink, take drugs (even if it's prescription), people who are circumcised, and anyone whose views oppose his own. Onision has recently started moderating his comments and disabling ratings on his videos, as people are realizing that he's a sick fuck and shouldn't make money from YouTube for retarded views to YouTube and his audience.

Before YouTube - Getting discharged from the Air Force

Believe it or not, but there was a time when Greg didn't go to YouTube every single day. One of the reasons being that YouTube hadn't been invented, the second was that he was busy being in the air force. Yes, this loser actually thought it was good idea to go in military. But because, fucking spoilers here, you actually have to learn to survive in the military, one of the disciplines was how to kill a wabbit. But, Greg dumb as shit actually refused, which ended up getting him stationed in South Korea. If it had been Best Korea he would probably have learned a thing or two about right from wrong. After having served, this crybaby started his YouTube channel as a way of dealing with all the emotional distress he had to bear.

I am a tool of death


https://web.archive.org/web/20130801234354/http://onisiondrama.jumpwiki.com/wiki/Onision, Greg

Onision is a coward. He is a seed of falsehood. He couldn’t follow orders! He even said it himself, when he said he was a conscientious objector. How can he be Pro American when he refused to follow military orders? Also it’s called the United States Armed Forces, what the hell did he think he was going to carry? FLOWERS?!”...Like I said before, He is a coward. He sucks. I’m done with him. If he actually did real combat, he’d probably end up first casualty.”


http://chaseagainstonision.tumblr.com/post/58215567710/marine-veterans-thoughts-on-onision, Someone's dad

But it is all a lie, and he was kicked off for other reasons, that are not known.: In a retard panic attack Gruck actually stripped buck naked in front of his CO to "show that he was human" (Gruck's own words), in actuality Gruck probably wanted the sergeant to Bareback him. Of course these were grounds on immediate dismissal on the don't ask, don't tell-clause. They probably realized that he was too mental to ever much of a faggot be in the military. Because the only way you would ever have to learn basic survival skills is if you attended SERE in order to become a pilot or Spec-Ops, you'd have to be 20, and he joined YouTube the same month as he turned 20, so once again Greg is full of shit. and gay.

The Beginning

He created his first YouTube account in 2006 where he had the idea to make a channel full of mundane rants about everyday shit, the first of which can be found here. In 2007, after coming to the realization that vlogging is fucking retarded, he changed his approach. He decided to contribute to YouTube by making shitty YouTube comedy sketches and copying Shane Dawson's style, meaning he expresses his pedophilia, and attraction to pale girls, thus creating his "I'm so" series and tutorials (as well as the shitty Chibi show with his ex-wife Skye). And a ton of other shit.

He also had a website as early as 2005. Some choice quotes:

I was born silently, and blue. My mom was originally told that I was going to turn out retarded, probably because when I was born my head was 14 1/2 inches around, and my chest was 13 1/2. The scanners I guess gave them the impression I was going to only be a quarter-wit... but luckily she decided not to abort, and here I am...


—Onision, this explains everything

For some reason before this time I had not seriously considered what I was to do... but seeing the rabbits in their cages, and having one innocently jump up at me trying to sniff my hand... I walked into the cadre's office and told them I would not do it ~ that I quit...


—Onision, on why he deserted his military duties

IRL "fame"

Nobody ever heard of Onision, until Daniel Tosh selected a video of Onision dancing in a banana suit. This is the zenith of Onision's career, and now that he has achieved this remarkable feat, he does not care for the e-fame that this article documents, and would like very much for it to go away.

If you look up the definition of “Celebrity” and then take a look at how many television networks I’ve been on, how many hundreds of millions of views I’ve gotten etc. you would be kidding yourself to suggest anyone calling me a “celebrity” is unreasonable.


Onision, making sure you know he is a "celebrity"

Onision's Videos

Onision's videos are a collection of bad advice, narcissistic half-baked opinions, uninformed rants about something stupid, why meat eaters are bad people, skits(a lot of which involve him wearing a banana suit or a fake mustache, for some reason), and masturbatory self praise. This guy loves the sound of his own voice.

Typical Onision videos and parodies

Protip: If you eat meat and circumcise your wiener, you're just as bad as a murdering pedophile.

Onision and mental breakdowns

Tested and approved to get you attention

Fans and Haters

Onision considers himself a celebrity, which can be considered the truth. He has thousands of followers who hang on his every word. But with fans, also comes haters (He has a LOT of them).

Onision Fans

Whiny retards(You fags think we don't notice your changes? Or that it's not gonna be reverted? LOL), mostly ugly 16-year old girls and sexually confused 13-year old boys who spend all their time on Onision's videos to hear the sound of his voice, which they love almost as much as Onision does. They circle-jerk each other in tribute to their benevolent "god", Onision. They take in anything he says, no matter how frequently stupid it is.DON'T PUBLICLY DISAGREE WITH HIM, OR HIS RETARDED FANS WILL RAGE AND COME AFTER YOUR ASS. His fans are easy to troll, all you have to do is disagree with his opinion and you'll start a major shitstorm.

Onision Haters

Trolls, moralfags with agendas, anyone who has two brain cells to rub together, and hatefags(like YOU and the faggots who keep turning this article to shit). Some of them are former fans that are butthurt that their hero turned out to be a disappointing narcissistic douche(Seriously how the fuck stupid do you have to be, not to have this fucking epiphany sooner), and are now are dedicated basement dwelling rejects. To Onision though, anyone who doesn't line up to suck his dick, or agree with everything he says, is a hater.

Banned from VidCon in 2012

In 2012, Hank Green (a rare Youtuber with actual motherfucking talent a cuck who didn't want another cuck upstaging him) kicked Onision off VidCon's speakers list and he was subsequently banned from entering VidCon due to being a faggot in his speaks videos. Butthurt about not being good enough for VidCon, he did what any faggot does, cry and bitch about it.

Many other Youtube partners (and concerned parents) didn't agree with his statements as well as many other users on YouTube. Thanks to the contributors, Onision will NOT be performing at VidCon.

Notice how Cuck clearly photoshopped his head on other bodies.
Onision's Webpage 2.0 in 2005

Twitter, Drama With Shay Karl, and Circumcisions

Most of his post on twitter includes of Cuber-bullying his ex's for having a dutteh house just because she dumped him or to reply to his haters. He also likes to use it to talk shit about his exes. He usually deletes his post but luckily, the Onision drama blog is here to keep that shit up on the internet, people even have Facebook pages dedicated to that shit.

In June 2010, Shay Carl announced that he was going to get a circumcision for his son on twitter. Being the caring human being Onision is, he decided to tell Shay Carl on twitter about how bad circumcision is, by calling him a monster, horrible father, and accusing him of mutilation due to the alleged "pain" of circumcision.

Onision's usual methods of shoving his own beliefs down everyone else's throats, while lying about his own shortcomings, came to bite him in the ass in the way of Shay's fans. Even Onision's own fans called him out for being a fag. All Onision could do was cry about it.

Oemgeeez foreskinz.png


The history of Sicesca
onision never had a cult website! - onision's fans

In 2005, Onision, at the age of 17 decided to create a cult named Sicesca. In this cult he would be the Cult leader and he would guide its members to enlightenment. According to the information about Sicesca, this cult was his plan to stop all animal hunger, any environmental harm, animal abuse, and force everyone to be vegetarians. If they disagreed, they would "fall back to the earth." In other words, he'd kill them. (Note: Onision wasn't a veg when creating this cult..) The website can be found here He baleeted it after getting a lot of criticism over it. And now he tries to ignore the past and blind his fans about all of it by pretending it never happened. Oh wait. The Sicesca Facebook page can be found here If you want to troll him for the lulz.

I Have No Cult! Don't You Believe Me?

It's very funny that when he claims that he doesn't have a cult his fans agree with him, but now when he says that he is going to resume the cult his blinded fans stumble over themselves to drink the koolaid.

Onision's Forums

Over 9000 forums

Onision might just be the worst forum owner ever. Since 2004 he has had upwards of 15 different forums. He really has no idea what he is doing with them, and every time one of his sites is taken down by a DoS attack, instead of simply restoring the website they way it was before, he decides to instead throw a hissy fit, blame the wrong people, and then 3 months later he makes a completely new forum. Upon an attack taking place in 2016 on one of his websites, Onision decided to blame his software provider for not being able to handle the attack rather than the company he was hosting with. Ragreynolds tried to explain to Onision on numerous occasions via email that the software was fine and the issue was with hosting, but Onision being the autist he is decided to completely ignore what he was being told and instead continued to blame the software provider.

Meat Gate

Long time members of Onision's forums will never forget that one time in 2011 when Onision decided to go full vegtard and ban every single meat eater from his website. But it didn't stop there, in fact he actually put censors over the names of different meat products so that when someone mentioned them they would be hit with a link to the If Slaughterhouses Had Glass Walls documentary.


Divorce from Skye

In January 2010 Onision divorced his wife, Skye Tantaga. After breaking up with Skye he immediately retreats to his dank corner of YouTube and begins painting the picture of her as the evil antagonist and him as the innocent martyr:

I felt as if the relationship was cluttered and wrong, and wasn't meant to be true.. And, so, I made the wrong decision to break up to, uh, act as if things weren't going to get better.. And, so, I just came to my final decision without thinking through it straight.



What Greg "forgot" to tell his fans is that the real reason he divorced Skye was because he was already fucking Shiloh at the time he delivered the divorce papers. The video of him talking about hitting a deer was a video of him using Skye's car to drive to the hotel where he planned on fucking the then underage Shiloh.

Alimony Woes from Skye

In Early 2012, Greg began to whine in his videos about how Skye was stealing his money. He said that the alimony payments he was forced to pay her was causing him such financial hardship that he couldn't afford to live anymore. Which considering he makes 6 figures a year off of his shitty Youtube partnership and the crappy shirts he shits onto his fans chests, he should be living quite well. The real reason Greg is dealing with financial hardship is that he's moved 4 fucking times in the last year. Once from Washington to Los Angeles. Then from Los Angeles back to Washington into a new house. Then when he moved to New Mexico so he could fuck his new underage jailbait whore. Then back to Washington. Let's not forget all of the airfare he spent flying his underage girlfriends to states where he could fuck them without going to jail.

Also, anyone with a brain knows that alimony is decided by a judge, and agreed on by both parties. So Greg claiming that Skye won't let him move on isn't her fault, it's his. If he didn't want to pay alimony, he shouldn't have fucked Shiloh and divorced his wife.


This pretty much sums it up.

Shiloh Hoganson (A.K.A; An attention whore who had a dog eat her out). A girl almost as crazy as Onision is. Onision met Shiloh over Skype and began sending her plane tickets so he could fuck her in states where it was legal to fuck underage girls. He loves himself some loli poon. Some may argue that he wanted her only because she was a popstar. When he was caught, he divorced his wife Skye for Shiloh. When Shiloh turned 18, Greg decided the best course of action was internet drama. When Shiloh started having memory problems, Onision did what came natural, videotape that shit, and not take her to the hospital.Which is the only LOLworthy thing he has ever uploaded.

"I wanna make a rainbow" & "Why I didn't call ambulance"

Shiloh and Greg happily announced that Shiloh was pregnant. Shiloh even had pictures of the pregnancy test. When they realized that she wouldn't be able to fake a pregnancy anymore(they forgot that pregnant women begin to show after a certain amount of time), they told everyone that Shiloh had a miscarriage. Shiloh then stole a picture of someone's sick baby and pretended it was her dead baby named Rogue, who belonged to Onision, and died right after childbirth. The actual parent of the sick baby in the picture found out that Shiloh was using the picture of her child and angrily messaged her about it, and shit hit the fan. Onision made a response, attacking the mother(Somebody find the video and stick it here!). People got pissed. Then they began lying about Shiloh having sepsis. Greg dumped her and sent her to Canada, when everyone called bullshit on that lie, he tried to save himself some shame by responding "guyz, I was lied to too, I'm pissed off with you. feel sorry for me."

Shiloh's nudes were leaked mid 2012 and Shiloh shut down almost all of her accounts. Any remaining are old and inactive. Someone did reupload them, though.

Taylor E Anderson

She's Legal Now Guyz!

Taylor came into the picture as a fangirl of Onision in late 2011 and in September. After one of his break ups with Shiloh, Taylor began to constantly tweet @onision and would persistently post on his website forums, kissing his butt and showing the world her growing obsession with him, constantly referring to him as being the perfect man and saying how she would like to marry him and Skype with him. Stating "Oh the things I would do to Onision". Onision started to reply to her both via his forums and twitter every so often over the next few months although he had gotten back together with Shiloh, that is until their final break up by Late December 2011/early January of 2012. It is believed that they started interacting with one another more, via Skype and other ways of communication. Then they met in person when Onision (secretly) flew down to New Mexico where she lives. He decided to rent a house there and he did until she graduated high school. Because she was only 17 after all. Anyhow, during their short relationship they have so far become engaged and wear rings for one another. (Just like he did with Shiloh.) But it seems to make Taylor feel special, because she likes to tweet pics of her with her ring occasionally. Onision and her have desperately tried to keep their relationship a secret, perhaps because he knows of the backlash he will receive for dating another underage girl and one who seems to be mentally unstable herself being so obsessed with him. Supposedly after her graduation in June she moved in with him, back into his prior house in Seattle. Taylor is now 20, and Onision has begun putting her in his videos and mentioning her on Twitter. Now that he can't be called a freak for fucking a 17 year old, he's taken the relationship public. He also refers to her as "Lainey", which is a probably the shittiest alias ever. He has now successfully knocked up Taylor and created a spawn. Onision has now revealed that he had been begging Taylor to cuck him with some dyke bitch nobody cares about. When Taylor refused, he started cheating on her with said Dyke. As a result, Taylor left him that very same night, and they plan to split up due to Onisions faggotry. He then released a horribly edited video crying about what a cuck he is, and expressing uncertainty about weather or not he'd ever get to see his little hellspawn ever again. Little shit might have a chance after all. He got his second chance. She also appears to be fawning over him like the used-to-be jailbait she was pretending it never happened like any other recovering relationship would, whilst he passively insults her and brings up cheating on her in every possible video regardless of context.

Taylor's Creepy Obsession and Ex's Intriguing Testimony About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Taylor getting married with the parents permission

In November of 2012, MrRepzion feeling concern of Onision new wife's fate decided to made a video exposing Onision regarding his marriage. The video in question was directed to the parents of his new wife, Taylor, alerting them that Onision were getting married without their knowledge and that she is going behind their back while her hard-working poor father have to pay for her college education. All is well until Onision come across the video, and start shitting bricks. Within a week, he baww profusely to YouTube about it and YouTube removed it to appeased his little dick. Their reasons for removing the video is that it contain "inappropriate content" and thus cannot be restored or reinstated. The original video has since been mirrored numerous times for the lulz, causing Onision's fan to go ballistic to this day.

Adrienne Jourgenson

Part one of the blog
Part two. Look that shit up on google if you wanna read the rest
Warning: Dirty vajayjay

Adrienne Jourgenson dated Onision for a few weeks after Greg's first breakup with Shiloh. When he stopped running from the Canadian Mafia, he hooked up with Adrienne over Skype.

A typical hipster with low self esteem. Adrienne proved to be a fucking idiot because she was dumb enough to let Onision pressure her into fucking him within 2 days of meeting him. After banging her, he made her feel bad about sleeping with a man she wasn't in a relationship with, so she decided to date him. Greg constantly harassed her afterwards to fuck her more, and to suck his dick. All he wanted was her to spend as much time on her knees polishing his tiny dick. When she refused to suck his dick, he dumped her. Then he tried to beg her back, when he wasn't getting pussy.

Greg began pressuring Adrienne to quit her job and move to Washington and into his house. He promised to pay her to edit his videos. Like a fucking dumbass she quit her job and prepared to leave friends and family behind. Then after she made a lame joke about loving pussy on her facebook, Onision freaked out about dating a possible lesbian so he dumped her(Even though he's tried to suck Shane Dawson's cock for a long time). He left her to figure out how to pay her bills since she was stupid enough to quit her job for a dumbass.

When Adrienne and Onision broke up, she made a (lulzy)blog about all his weird shit he did, when they were together(Did you know that when he and Adrienne first made out, he made her wear a mustache? He also faps to hentai[Shiloh confirmed this too]). He got butthurt and started harassing her with voice mails and messages, shit got creepy and lulzy.

Keep listening, shit gets creepier as it goes on.

Greg then got back with Shiloh. Still sore about Adrienne's blog, and that she put the voicemails out on youtube, he decided that running Adrienne's name through the mud was the best way to go, to get back at her, and also for everyone to accept Shiloh again. He told people in his videos that Shiloh had a clean house unlike his ex (Adrienne) who had a very dirty house. When Greg got a bunch of backlash for slandering an ex-girlfriend in an epic display of moar butthurt, he denied ever saying it. He deleted the video in the process to hide the evidence. No-life haters had managed to mirror it, for everyone to see Onision act a bitch.

Lainey (Greg getting/being cucked)

Use scrollbar to see the full image

Onision Relationship 2015.png
This is an adult

Disregard that, separated

Because there are no brakes on this failtrain of stupid decisions and stupid people, this relationship was ended when Lainey wanted to cum for once, so she wanted to see a girl to eat out her pussy, as it is well known that Greg doesn't munch the beef curtains. So Lainey found a girl that could make all her dreams come true. But then Greg got really jelly, and wanted the girl, for some reason. Even though he was too busy to fuck his wife at home, because he was working all the time. YouTube is not a job. So Greg and the other girl started cuddling.

Disregard that, still together

Greg and Lainey are still together. He is still passively insulting her and bringing up cheating on her in roughly every other video as well. Not to mention she is fawning over him like nothign ever happened. Goes to show that getting a woman pregnant is a good way to make sure you can get away with doing stupid shit that would otherwise end with your ass in a cardboard box holding a sign for money.

Turtle Killing


To prove his absolute disdain for animals, and also to show his absolute stupidity, Onision decided to let his pet turtle, Reptar, have a horrible excruciating slow death by suffocation, while being boiled alive. While everyone, above the age of 7 knows to poke air holes in containers, and how heat works inside small containers, this is of course not common knowledge by Greg.

Onision Turtle Soup.jpg

At least Reptar tasted delicious


—Onision, When he rejoiced over eating meat

Taking on Anonymous

On March 5, 2013, our friendly neighborhood Onision put out a video response to "Anonymous" and their exploits on him.

If you didn't want to watch the video, then all you missed out on was Onision victimizing himself because everything is everybody else's fault all the time. This stance was short lived however; quickly turning from helpless, wounded doe, to vicious, epic troll-master making sick burns such as "Nobody in anonymous has a job", and "All anonymous people play World of Warcraft" (Which he added a quick "Nobody even plays it anymore!" jab, disregarding the fact that it has 10 million players. But hey, fuck logic and facts when they oppose your world views, right?). All of this however was garbled and lost as the video took a downward spiral of screaming and emotion. And if you did have the privilege of watching the video, then you probably saw got Onision dressing like a boy the entire time up until near the end where she finally enters the room in her casual attire of yellow-and-red sundress with matching purse and glasses before promptly ripping off his shirt and wallowing in condiments.

All in all, I rate this video a solid meh/10. I honestly cant tell if he's deliberately acting this way to whore for attention, or if he's legitimately this fucking dense and creepy.

Taking on ED

Almost one month after his stance on "Anonymous", our most loveable autistic hero discovered his ED page and became extremely pissed about it. He then went over to his personal website and wrote a large page rebutting every fucking word on his article while slandering ED's good name. When ED admins come over to try to help him solve the problem with his article on Twitter, he proceeded to block them all because he is a big baby and he hated to be proven wrong by them. This proves that Onision has no sense of humor whatsoever. If that is not already enough drama, his whiny fantards come over here to wage a lulzy ten day long pointless edit war with the EDitors and Sysops before being nuked the fuck out of ED all at once for their extreme faggotry. Order is restored back on ED and hilarity ensues. Total casualties from this retarded editing campaign: Nine ED accounts belonging to Onision's whiny fantards defeated (lol even Chris-chan has more support than that, srsly) and nothing of value was lost.

"Hey Creepy Stalker, Stop Writing My Family Members!"

On April of 2013, it all started when D0NTSTANDSOCL0SET0ME decided to stir up more drama by writing a bunch of mysterious snail mails to Onision's in-laws. His motive for surreptitiously sending these irritating snail mails was most likely being that he wants to save Taylor from Onision like she is some sort of damsel in distress suffering from Stockholm syndrome, which to him, seems to be the case. The letters eventually reached Taylor and she told Onision that she strongly suspected it to be MrRepzion's doing. Onision purposely believed her claim despite having whopping zero evidence to support it because he sees MrRepzion as his mortal enemy just for making 12 videos in the span of four years taking apart his faulty arguments. Like what he did in his "Anonymous" video, he went on to make five videos victimizing himself all in a span of one month while deliberately leaving out logic and facts that oppose his views on MrRepzion. MrRepzion see Onision's video and then uploaded his own video successfully defending himself against Onision's false allegations on May 6, 2013, causing our dear Onision to either making private or unlisted all of his video against MrRepzion out of shame. Immediately after the shitstorm cleared up, D0NTSTANDSOCL0SET0ME's YouTuber account was terminated for harassing, bullying or threatening. What is even more lulzy is following this drama, big YouTube star HappyCabbie happily made a blog documenting this whole incident and justified Onision's actions against MrRepzion.

His "Novels"

Desperate to stay relevant, Onision hopped on the Youtuber trend of book writing, despite the fact that he hasn't read one in 14 years.

Using his skills of manipulation, he brainwashed his fans into giving them five stars and spam reviews full of bogus shit not relevant to the plot.

This book was amazing! I love the part where the kool-aid man bursted through the wall of Greg's room. And the plot twist where the kool-aid man falls in love with Greg, everyone needs a moment to cringe. There being a even bigger plot twist which the kool-aid man is Andy Biersack. Greg and Andy spend the rest of their live together, get married, have intense butt sex, they even had a baby. just when Greg is about to die he wakes up. Everything was just a dream while he was in a two year coma. When the kool-aid man bursts through the wall, leading Greg to a never ending paradox.


— A favorite copypasta review amongst his fans.

Stones to Abbifail

He published his first novel, Stones to Abbigale, on March 29, 2015.

Note the generic ass YA cover, which is an accurate description of the novel: generic.

Stones to Abbigale is the story of a High School Junior named James and his progress at getting into the pants of his love interest Abbi. He takes advantage of friends, family, teachers, acquaintances, even takes advantage of a SCHOOL SHOOTING in order to finally gain the ultimate prize in his "love quest". It's really boring, and a dead Taiwanese hooker could probably write something better.

I want to be direct, my name is Greg. I go by "Onision" online. This book is made up of events that occurred in my own life mixed with fiction from the made up life of James. James is essentially a better version of myself. His home, his school & his life all resemble my own at his age. The people James analyzes and is surrounded by are not so unlike those I've known as well. I have experienced much of the loss James has however his happier moments are more often than not also mine. I want to share my story without it being purely non-fiction. I simply felt this approach would make for a far better book. At points I cried while writing this, at others I laughed. Stones To Abbigale is not just a book I wrote, it is a piece of who I am.


—Onision admitting that it's actually a wish-fulfillment version of his life.

There is nothing to say about the actual prose except that a half-dead nigger in Africa is more literate than Onision.

The plot is basically nonexistent, and the chapters can't even be counted as episodic. Sure, there's a lot of pointless drama, but that shit doesn't matter because it leads up to nothing. None of the characters go through any significant development at all, nor are they relatable or sympathetic. My Immortal has more interesting characters, and more lulz-worthy than this paper-smeared horseshit. There is one sex scene in this book, and it makes 50 Shades of Gray look like a eloquent masterpiece. The school shooting scene happens early in the book, and is described in graphic detail. It's almost like a snuff film in written form. As you can probably guess, Seth was the perpetrator. During the scene, James runs back into the school save Abbi, giving no shits about anyone else who is hiding from the killer. Classic.

James has a giant superiority complex and judges everyone around him in the form of unreadable purple prose and metaphors that make about as much sense. He is extremely attached to Abbi, and exploits the tragedies she goes through to win her trust and eventually get a little taste of her pussy. Everything revolves around him, and is hailed as a hero after the shooting. Not to mention at Davis' funeral, his mother talks more about James's influence on her dead child than anything.

Abbigale is about as distinguished as a cardboard cutout of a vagina, and is nothing more than a carbon copy of James. She has an angsty past, which is the only remotely amusing thing in the book. Her father would beat her for the lulz, until he gets arrested half way into the novel, and is never heard from again. She also had an abusive boyfriend named Seth, who is just plain Batshit crazy. In a giant block of letter-written exposition, Abbi admits that she was gang raped, and became pregnant as a result. Of course, Seth was merciful enough to beat the shit out of her until she miscarried; effectively sparring her from the horrors of motherhood.

David is undoubtedly the most retarded character in the entire book, and is the physical embodiment of Chris Chan and your "LOL rAnDOm XD" phase in middle school. He was most likely a closeted faggot as well, since he admitted he loved James at some point. Luckily, he gets his dumbass killed at the end of the book by getting hit by a car.

You can find it for free here. Proceed with caution.

This is Why I Hate You

A glorified version of Onision's life. That's it. Not much to say here.

Onision, as usual, can't take criticism. Pussy.

Onision was not satisfied with the sacrifices of five star reviews and cock sucking he was getting from his fanbase. Too many criticisms of his books sent him in a butthurt frenzy, so he expressed it the way he usually does when he's told the truth. He uploaded a video making commentary about the more critical reviews. He just makes the same joke about how they didn't read the book. (Not that anyone with a working brain would want to, anyway.)

Attacking Evalion

Evalion was a YouTuber who specialized in making lulzy videos that insulted Jews, Muslims, fags; praised Hitler, along with dozens of other troll videos. Onision got butthurt from her videos, and along with LeafyIsHere, waged a mass-reporting war against her. After two days, their autistic chimpout was a success after their millions of 12 year old fans flagged her enough to get the JewTube staff to terminate her account.


Like other famous egotistical fags on youtube (such as TheAmazingAtheist), Onision is much creepier than we've believed so far- he's a pedophile, or at least a hebephile at that. Onision runs his own cheesy little forum, where a subforum exists exclusively for his fangirls (many of which are under 18- often as low as 12) can take naughty photos of themselves in their underwear for Onision and his crew to judge and fap to. He's been keeping this gig going for years and has yet to be prosecuted. Despite the fact that 9 times out of 10 someone would get v& in a heartbeat for such activity, it seems nobody has yet to contact the FBI or local authorities over this matter and bring this sick demented fuck to justice. The pedo ring has caused a massive scandal around Christmas 2016, with hundreds of news companies publishing stories covering the drama, which caused Onision to lock down his forums and make all attached files unlisted. You have to register an account and have an admin manually approve it to see that hot teenage ass. Sorry to kill your boner, goy.



Onision's Pride About missing Pics
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How to Troll Onision

The butthurt is strong in this one
  • Be Encyclopedia Dramatica Properly removed due to butthurt. So yes, obviously trolled. Wayback version / ArchiveToday-favicon.png(archive)
  • State that you eat meat (and that you enjoy it).
  • Send him a link to one of Epic Meal Time's meat eating videos.
  • Prove him wrong- or just disagree with him.
  • Ask him why "Smellzyebutt" isn't in his videos anymore.
  • Send him a leaked video about him.
  • Ask "did you cheat on your ex-wife?"
  • Ask about his ex's.
  • Ask him why he deletes his videos.
  • State that you don't care about any other animal except dogs and cats.
  • Use reasoning and logic when confronting him, two things he has absolutely no experience in.
  • Criticize him with a valid opinion.
  • State that you are circumcised.
  • Tell him if he wants a self-diagnosis of his psyche again, he should look up narcissism, since he exhibits enough traits to be diagnosed a high-level-narcissist.
  • Post a video online titled "RE:Onision", where you just eat meat through the whole video.
  • Have a civil conversation with him in Vidcon after parodying his shit.
  • According to TakeShotAction eating a banana actually brings his ego down, maybe because he was jealous of not getting enough cock.
Cugly's property value, in case you feel like donating.

External links




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Onision is part of a series on Enemies of the Lulz
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Featured article April 9 & 10, 2013
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Onision Succeeded by
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Featured article June 19 & 20 2016
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