Mike Pence

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Mike Pence
Or is it?

Michael Richard Pence is a polished 1950s movie-star and generic retarded satanic, conservative puppet of the ZOG. He came to prevalence after The Donald, desperate for votes from the Religious Right after Clinton pwned Sanders, took him in as his Vice President during the 2016 Elections.

Notable for his stances against faggotry (despite being one himself) and leftism, and his support for the Tea Party movement, Pence is likely to be POTUS after the establishment conspires to eliminate Trump. Should this happen, it is presumed the madman will set Dumbfuckistan back 20 years, just as was tradition with the Bush and Obongo presidencies.


Pence signed the controversial Religious Freedom Restoration Act into law, producing immense amounts of butthurt, mainly from fags. He signed a law which blocked Indianan governments from requiring wages be provided at a rate higher than the standard minimum wages. He pissed off public school workers because he went on to help fund pre-schools, charter schools and parent's rights. He pissed schools off even more when he signed a bill that allowed Guns to be kept on school grounds (namely, in vehicles) in an attempt to make schools safer. He also opposes Common Core. He also pissed off more leftist fags when he successfully haulted renewable energy efforts (such as Solar), fighting for coal based energy. In an effort to make fags die from HIV, he worked to prevent medical treatment for those with AIDS, such as draining funding for needles necessary for injection of medicine. Mike is proudly against abortion; he attempted to defund planned parenthood, and worked block abortion services provided by third parties. He's also against sexual education and is against Stem-cell research. Notable for severe hatred of faggotry, Pence has been fucking with LGBT rights since the late 90s... Wait a minute, there is one major religion in the world that shares his belief of Fag Holocaust! OH THE IRONY

He was also a staunch supporter of the Patriot Act. Pence is against the scam that is Global Warming.

Vice Presidency

Shock the filthy fucking faggot once and for all!

Why would God-Emperor of Mankind Donald Trump (who supports gay marriage) forge an alliance with this mentally retarded redneck? Simple: pragmatism. When cheating bitch Hillary Clinton completely pwn3d Bernie Sanders and got the votes of minority scum such as niggers, Kebab and feminists, and while the Evangelical Right and almost every Republican completely DESPISES Trump as an immoral atheist porn addict who supports gay marriage, Trump had to make a compromise with the Religious Right if he was to get his Presidency and save us from a worse regime under Clinton or any of the other retards the Republicans supported like Ted Cruz. The Ends Justify the Means.

That's wat Pence originally was: a tool for Trump to ascend as Emperor, even if they had the COMPLETE OPPOSITE of political philosophy. That's why Trump anointed him as his VP during the 2016 elections, picking Pence as life insurance. Ideally, once he secured the vote Pence would be fired.... but in reality it won't work because the US Constitution is not the Apprentice. Pence served as Vice President knowing full well that he will backstab Trump in the end, and the GOP would work to get trump 'eliminated', thus allowing this neocon nutjob to be the real president. Traitors within the Republican Party want Trump dead. If he's impeached or murdered, Pence will be the new president and has a track record of extreme republicuntism. This should help scare away lots of crazy SJW rats from trying anything. In the event that the god emperor is slain, The United States will inevitably revert to the Dark Ages allowing the more technologically-advanced atheists over the Pacific to rule the world.

Confirmed Aliases

  1. Mike "Suck Cock? Get Shocked" Pence
  2. Mike "Homo medicine from Thomas Edison" Pence
  3. Mike "Jerk it to a guy, Get shocked 'til you die" Pence
  4. Mike "Lightning crashes if you put it in men's asses" Pence
  5. Mike "Resist the chaps or get the zaps" Pence
  6. Mike "Fags beware or get the chair" Pence
  7. Mike "Show desire, get the wire" Pence
  8. Mike "Male flattery drains the battery" Pence
  9. Mike "Gay people should be killed" Pence
  10. Mike "Zap the wussy until he likes pussy" Pence
  11. Mike "Follow God's path or feel Tesla's wrath" Pence
  12. Mike "Set phasers to straight" Pence
  13. Mike "the Vampire Slayer" Pence
  14. Mike "Say goodnight, sodomite" Pence
  15. Mike "If they suck dicks, beat them with sticks" Pence
  16. Mike "Watt Watt in the Butt" Pence
  17. Mike "Taze the rainbow" Pence
  18. Mike "A little more juice turns Caitlyn back to Bruce" Pence
  19. Mike "An Electric Current is the best FAG deterrent" Pence
  20. Mike "Turning fruits into vegetables" Pence
  21. Mike "Doing things most heinous to those who like it in the anus" Pence
  22. Mike "Poo-stabber Zapper" Pence
  23. Mike "One Man Homocaust" Pence
  24. Mike "AC/DC for the LGBT" Pence
  25. Mike "Alternating Current for Alternate Lifestyles" Pence
  26. Mike "LGBTQ BBQ" Pence
  27. Mike "Got an urge for cock? Get a surge of shock!" Pence
  28. Mike "fudge packer? you get the zapper" Pence
  29. Mike "Omar Mateen? I'M the real KING" Pence
  30. Mike "Frotteurism? Cauterize him" Pence
  31. Mike "You like Rimjobs? I like cattle prods" Pence
  32. Mike "You're a sissy? Enjoy electricity" Pence
  33. Mike "Homoshima and Fagasaki" Pence
  34. Mike "Ignite the Sodomites" Pence
  35. Mike "Zap the Trap on the Back of his Lap" Pence
  36. Mike "Current Affairs" Pence
  37. Mike "Putting the Amp in Straight Camp" Pence
  38. Mike "Pull the trigger on every fag nigger" Pence
  39. Mike "Ohm-os for the Homos" Pence
  40. Mike "shoot the queer like deer" Pence
  41. Mike "I don't like gay people" Pence
  42. Mike "I REALLY don't like gay people" Pence
  43. Mike "I'm in the closet tbh" Pence
  44. Mike "hertz for homos" Pence
  45. Mike "Electrocute the fruit" Pence
  46. Mike "Flay the Gay Away" Pence
  47. Mike "3 phase for gays" Pence
  48. Mike "Emma Wattson" Pence
  49. Mike "Pants or dress? Hate fags, the answer's yes" Pence
  50. Mike "Dropping Fags and Loading Mags" Pence
  51. Mike "Feel the itch? I flip the switch" Pence
  52. Mike "Electroshock your love of cock" Pence
  53. Mike "Cocksuckers are in for a shocker" Pence
  54. Mike "Want to get pounded? Please stay grounded" Pence
  55. Mike "The closet electrician" Pence
  56. Mike "Disco Inferno" Pence
  57. Mike "If you Catch or Pitch, I flip the switch" Pence
  58. Mike "Jolting fear into the queer" Pence
  59. Mike "Spray the Gay Away" Pence
  60. Mike "Make the Queer- Disappear!" Pence
  61. Mike "Pole Smoker CHOKER" Pence
  62. Mike "Cockblocker" Pence
  63. Mike "The best homo deterrent is a direct current" Pence
  64. Mike "Adam and Steve meet Volta and Ampere" Pence
  65. Mike "Stick your wiener there and it's the chair" Pence
  66. Mike "Having a gay fap? You're getting a zap" Pence
  67. Mike "Enjoy the static or get back in the attic" Pence
  68. Mike "If you like dick, it's gonna get elec" Pence
  69. Mike "Gas kills the Jew and the Faggot too" Pence
  70. Mike "Jerk It To A Guy, Circuit 'Til You Fry" Pence
  71. Mike "If you're into gents you must repent" Pence
  72. Mike "If you like men, the dial goes to ten" Pence
  73. Mike "play with the willy, you get the killy" Pence
  74. Mike "Electrocution is the Final Solution" Pence
  75. Mike "Hate the pussy? Get the Juicy" Pence
  76. Mike "Suck a cock? You get a shock" Pence
  77. Mike "Reach around, short-to-ground" Pence
  78. Mike "Ambassador of the Capacitor" Pence
  79. Mike "Make America Straight Again" Pence
  80. Mike "Like a guy? Abreit macht frei" Pence
  81. Mike "You're a fag? Get in this bag" Pence
  82. Mike "If you're bi, you're gonna fry" Pence
  83. Mike "Zap the fags, race war now" Pence
  84. Mike "Raining men with chlorine" Pence
  85. Mike "Jolting fear into the queer" Pence
  86. Mike "Putting Faradays in gays" Pence
  87. Mike "LGBT OMG WTF BBQ" Pence
  88. Mike "Bum-Driller Killer" Pence
  89. Mike "Ol' Three-phase" Pence
  90. Mike "Race Bannon" Pence
  91. Mike "Let the Shock Therapy Commence" Pence
  92. Mike "It's NOT okay to be gay" Pence
  93. Mike "I'll stab you in your fucking throat faggot" Pence
  94. Mike "Empty my "9" in the homo's 'mind'" Pence
  95. Mike "One in Five won't Survive" Pence
  96. Mike "Fucked a guy? Time to die" Pence
  97. Mike "Leave no fag or kike alive" Pence
  98. Mike "Dead gay a day keeps the faggotry at bay" Pence
  99. Mike "It's only a phase, now here's a taze" Pence
  100. Mike "If men make you jerk it, you complete the circuit" Pence
  101. Mike "Ass full of juice, face full of Zeus" Pence
  102. Mike "If you can't pray the gay away, you need 1.5 volts from a double A" Pence
  103. Mike "Ass deflowered? The chair gets powered" Pence
  104. Mike "If you don't like twat, prepare for a gigawatt" Pence
  105. Mike "If you like gays I'll shock you for days" Pence
  106. Mike "No tomorrah for Gomorrah" Pence
  107. Mike "Use sodomites for Christmas lights" Pence
  108. Mike "Give a man head, I'll fill you with lead" Pence
  109. Mike "100 Amps to the Nipple Clamps" Pence
  110. Mike "ECT the POC" Pence
  111. Mike "The Best Defense is a Good" Pence
  112. Mike "Fence in Wyoming" Pence
  113. Mike "Cattle Prod the Wannabe Broad" Pence
  114. Mike "Take the lobbyist to Auschwitz" Pence
  115. Mike "7.62 for LGBTQ" Pence
  116. Mike "Homo-cidal" Pence
  117. Mike "Glitter gets you the chair" Pence
  118. Mike "Turn the Fister Into a Resistor" Pence
  119. Mike "Killing the Lobby is my only Hobby" Pence
  120. Mike "Put the queers on a Trail of Tears" Pence
  121. Mike "Add another pyre for the faggot fire" Pence
  122. Mike "Third Rail for the Failed Male" Pence
  123. Mike "Fourth Reich, Third Rail" Pence
  124. Mike "270+ Electoral Volts" Pence
  125. Mike "One Watt for Every Impure Thought" Pence
  126. Mike "These Fags I Will Not Kill, But You Gotta See My Electric Bill" Pence
  127. Mike "Clean Your Closet with an Electric Deposit" Pence
  128. Mike "The Orlando Shooting had me Laughing and Hooting" Pence
  129. Mike "Enola the Gays" Pence
  130. Mike "A Silo Just For Milo" Pence
  131. Mike "Believing in Evolution Explains Your Sexual Confusion" Pence
  132. Mike "4th Reich Mike" Pence
  133. Mike "You like it in the pooper? I'll beat you into a stupor" Pence
  134. Mike "Hang the fag with the flag" Pence
  135. Mike "Fag Drag" Pence
  136. Mike "Day of the rope gives me hope" Pence
  137. Mike "One black bag for every fag" Pence
  138. Mike "Want it in the shitter? Take him to the skinner" Pence
  139. Mike "Punch the gays so hard they visit ayys" Pence
  140. Mike "Fagopult" Pence
  141. Mike "Bundle the faggots and put them in the fire" Pence
  142. Mike "The gays will hang for days" Pence
  143. Mike "Give the man a medal, he killed a homosexual" Pence
  144. Mike "Shoot up a LGBT School" Pence
  145. Mike "Prolapsed rectum? Vivisect 'em" Pence
  146. Mike "Red flag from blood of the fag" Pence
  147. Mike "Balls to the Van Der Waals" Pence
  148. Mike "Jolt to the dick, These people are sick" Pence
  149. Mike "MIKE AND NOT KIKE" Pence
  150. Mike "Electrum Rectum" Pence
  151. Mike "Make the Twink Light Up and Blink" Pence
  152. Mike "Like Man Meat? Have a Seat" Pence
  153. Mike "Proposition 800,000 Volts" Pence
  154. Mike "Make Like a Bee and Buzz the Bears" Pence
  155. Mike "Desist with the Fist or Zeus Will Insist" Pence
  156. Mike "Get Caught Rimming and the Lights Start Dimming" Pence
  157. Mike "Twisted Trans-istors" Pence
  158. Mike "It's heinous in the anus" Pence
  159. Mike "Frag Grenade for the Fag Parade" Pence
  160. Mike "If they act odd in the shower, Crank up the power" Pence
  161. Mike "If It's Not a Vagina, You're Going to China" Pence
  162. Mike "Like getting it raw? Be used to demonstrate Ohm's law" Pence
  163. Mike “Like it in the crapper? You get the zapper!” Pence
  164. Mike "Deus Volt" Pence
  165. Mike "Blast the Gays with Tesla Rays" Pence
  166. Mike "Gamma Ray the Gay Away" Pence


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See Also

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Mike Pence is part of a series on
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