Lucian Hodoboc

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Lucian attempts to prey on teenage girls.
He's an artist.

Lucian Hodoboc (also known as Alakazam, Ala, TheLHShowChannel, Lucian Pedoboc and Corpse Midget) is an oddly-proportioned Romanian paedophile and YouTuber who owns, a shitty forum that was formerly known as – hilariously ironic considering the fact that he himself is more hideous than Zoe Quinn's n00dz.

When not making videos of himself talking about his favourite animu or pretending to be a little girl, Lucian can usually be found creeping on vulnerable teenage girls and defending the virtues of child pornography in his website's chat room.

Beautiful Forums

What a paedophile looks like.

"Beautiful Forums" was a shittastic internet forum that claimed to be about learning to see the beauty in life or some dumb shit like that. In reality, Beautiful Forums was merely a way for Lucian to get close to young girls so he can obtain their photos and add them to his collection of fap material. To accomplish this goal, Lucian spent the majority of his days trolling teen forums and randomly messaging 12-year-old girls to offer them staff positions on his shithole of a site. His latest plot is using the death of Harambe as a prop to acquire pics of underage tits.

He also paid Tyrone to shill his site on YouTube. Much to our surprise, several attractive ladies enjoy his e-company enough to make 20 second videos about how Lucian is a good friend of theirs... Not even kidding.

Lucian the Fake Asexual

I'm asexual, bro!

Lucian constantly claims himself to be asexual, but his creepy arse behaviour towards adolescent girls and his love of hardcore Japanese fetish porn suggests otherwise. Among Lucian's other actions that contradict his claims of asexuality is his habit of cybering on IMVU with an avatar that's part self-insert and part Gerard Way. He even paid real money to upgrade his IMVU membership.

Lucian Hodoboc About missing Pics
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Lucian has also drawn "artwork" that depicts his idealized self-insert getting it on with moderately attractive women who are most likely based on several of the teenage girls that he's constantly stalking and sexually harassing online.

Self-Harming Emo Faggotry

As one would expect from a man who looks like Gerard Way's abortion, Lucian is a self-harming emo faggot who enjoys slicing his arms and legs with razor blades to relieve the pain of not slicing his arms and legs with razor blades. Not only does Lucian cut himself, he also used razor blades to carved one of his female members' names into his leg.

Due to his Christian faith, Lucian has stated that he isn't allowed to kill himself.

Bans & Spergrage

He spammed Ionic Forums so much that they had to close registrations. actually unbanned him to get him to stop spamming them with his 200 alts.

Shockingly, it turns out that many sites on the internets aren't very welcoming to paedophile midgets who attempt to groom their underage female members – A fact that's led to Lucian being b& from many of the forums that he joins. Lucian's reaction to being banned is always the same – Register a shitload of ban-dodging accounts and then spam the fuck out of their forums until they agree to unban his sorry arse.

Striking with the grace of Grawp and the persistence of Grace Saunders, Lucian often proves himself to be a formidable opponent and has actually caused numerous sites to disable and limit account registration in an attempt to stop his spergrage. even agreed unban the tiny paedo so he'd leave them alone – Proving once again that there are people in the world who are willing to negotiate with terrorists.

All I want is to have my account un-banned. If she leaves my account un-banned, I will never post or come to Ionic EVER again. I swear on my honor as a Christian.


—Lucian is a good Christfag

- (AVEN) - banned back in 2012 for arguing with a moderator (username: alakazam), made at least 200 accounts, that got banned and /or deleted by the admins. Their admins finally gave up decided to allow me to visit the forums after:
  • sending several spam reports to my ISP (which did nothing, cause they don't monitor their clients activity)
  • blacklisting most of the Romanian, Russian and Ukranian IP classes
  • banning 200 of my yahoo and hotmail e-mail addresses
  • implementing manual account validation for several months

and after having me promise that I will leave their community alone.


—Lucian brags about his ban from

- - banned back in the summer of 2013... I have no idea why(username: alakazam), made at least 100 accounts, that got banned. Still making new account every week. Their admins blacklisted many IP classes of all Eastern Europe, implemented the "miserable users" feature for VPN users, banned 100 e-mail addresses, and tripled their number of global moderators with banning powers. Yet, they get a spam raid every week.


—Lucian brags about another ban

- - banned back in the autumn of 2013... for fighting with Bree (username: alakazam), made 50 accounts, that got banned, the admins (Kamran and Shane) finally decided to let me keep one of my latest accounts, after getting sick or seeing all their registration filters failing and realizing that restricting registrations would cause the forums to stagnate.


—Lucian brags about yet another ban

Lucian Pretends to be a 15-year-old on Teen Hut

The world's oldest and ugliest 15-year-old boy.
One of Lucian's apparent "crushes" looks like she's 13.

Sometime last Thursday, Lucian decided to join Teen Hut in an attempt to lure in some succulent young jailbait. Hilariously, Lucian also decided to pretend to be a 15-year-old boy – Something that he might have gotten away with if he hadn't posted his disgusting photos.

Soon after Lucian joined Teen Hut, a member named Best Friend became suspicious of the strangely old-looking teenager who was creeping on Teen Hut's female members. Naturally, Best Friend fired up The Google and searched for more information on Lucian, eventually coming across an article on a fine site known as Encyclopædia Dramatica. What Best friend discovered was shocking! Lucian wasn't a 15-year-old boy at all, but rather a midget paedophile with a history of grooming young wimminz on the internets! Armed with this information, Best Friend contacted the innocent young ladies on Teen Hut and warned them of the tiny threat and then confronted Lucian with the fact that he wasn't a 15-year-old boy.

Lucian quickly came up with a hilarious defense and asserted that he really was 15 and suffers from TsimFuckis syndrome or some shit. Naturally, noone bought this obvious lie and Lucian soon found his 30-year-old midget arse b& from Teen Hut for being a disgusting nonce.

Lucy vs. ED

He's asexual, you monsters!

In August, 2016, Lucian finally stumbled upon the 9-month-old ED stub that bore his name. As one would expect, Lucian was very displeased that he had been doxxed and immediately went crying to his friend LOLNOPE, his skype is professorlh. You know what to do and demanding that they DoS ED. Lucian was also under the false impression that his arch-nemesis, a gay nigger tranny by the name of Micah Dawson, was responsible for adding information about his paedophilic tendencies and YouTube attention whoring to the fine archive of knowledge that is ED.


Lucian is currently whoring himself out on the shit-scented streets of Romania in a futile attempt to raise the 2 million dollars that he needs to bring down ED.

UPDATE: Mini-Dracula is now telling his contacts that he will launch a lolsuit against ED if this article leads to any "cyber-bullying" against him on social media. Yes, the half-man who was banned from Teen Hut for harassing its female members and being a creepy arse paedophile is actually threatening to sue us for pointing out the fact that he's a creepy arse paedophile who joins sites for teens!

Lucian lolsuit.jpg

Beautiful Forums gets H4ck3d by ED trolls!!111

Lucian lies about what happened to BF.
One of the ponyphile fudgepackers who joined ED just to vandalize this article.

On September 7, 2016, only a few days after this article was featured, Beautiful Forums was briefly taken offline as a direct result of Encyclopædia Dramatica trolls – Except that's not actually what happened at all.

Meet Milos1337 and ArchLinux-Matt, a pair of white knighting twats who were banned from ED after vandalizing this article last Thursday. Both happened to be admins on Beautiful Forums despite not being 12-year-old girls. Contrary to the narrative that Lucian attempted to spin after BF's downtime, it was actually these two cunts (and supposed "friends" of Lucian) who were responsible for the so-called "hacking" of Beautiful Forums.

What happened? Milos and Arch decided that they'd help make Beautiful Forums great again and began a massive cleanup of the site – And by "massive cleanup" we of course mean that they demoted all of the staff and then started deleting accounts and threads en masse.

[12:32:42 PM] Hanna .: My status update where I told arch that he shouldn't be deleting status updates and threads is gone
[12:33:08 PM] HOI I'M TEM: pretty much everyone in my school loves grey’s anatomy
[12:36:22 PM] Hanna .: Lel
[12:36:41 PM] Caleb: I hate it so muxh
Hanna .
[12:38:33 PM] Hanna .: Why was this thread hidden?
[12:40:02 PM] Sh ö p ø ke: Wtf
[12:40:50 PM] Hanna .: Hm
[12:42:57 PM] Caleb: Arch x Milos 4 demtion
[12:43:03 PM] Caleb: demotion*
[12:43:36 PM] Hanna .: What
[12:46:02 PM] Milos: listen. arch is to be kept as is
[12:46:06 PM] Milos: do not restrict his permissions
[12:46:23 PM | Removed 12:49:22 PM] Milos: This message has been removed.
[12:46:34 PM | Removed 12:49:25 PM] Milos: This message has been removed.
[12:46:42 PM] Hanna .: What?
[12:47:03 PM] Hanna .: Me?
[12:47:07 PM] Milos: not you
[12:48:38 PM] Hanna .: Oh my
[12:52:08 PM] Hanna .: (gran)
[12:53:29 PM] Hanna .: Can someone do me a favor
[12:54:55 PM] Sh ö p ø ke: What do you need?
[12:59:06 PM] Zara: No, arch abused power twice even though we told him not to mess with selene's account
[12:59:43 PM] Zara: Milos demoted us all
[12:59:49 PM] Hanna .: Why
[12:59:54 PM] Zara: I don't know
[1:00:35 PM] Hanna .: Milos check PM
[1:26:09 PM] Meh: Milos deleted a member's account. He should be banned, right?
[1:26:26 PM] Hanna .: He deleted Selena's account?
[1:26:32 PM] Hanna .: Selenes*
[1:26:50 PM] Zara: Yep
[1:26:54 PM] Meh: Yeah. Hanna, take care of him.
[1:27:03 PM] Hanna .: You want me to ban him?
[1:27:19 PM] Meh: No. I want you to take him to the back yard and shoot him.
[1:27:27 PM] Hanna .: Sounds fun, okay
[1:27:31 PM] Zara: Ala you fuck ass where are my perms
[1:27:48 PM] Zara: I will shoot you up the ass next time you say 'I wasn't really serious'
[1:28:08 PM] Meh: Someone demoted me too
[1:28:09 PM] Meh: Kek
[1:28:34 PM] Zara: Oh please we all know you can fix that from the time Abdul banned you
[1:28:55 PM] Hanna .: I was demoted
[1:29:01 PM] Meh: He deleted my account
[1:29:08 PM] Zara: Ha he demoted everyone
[1:29:15 PM] Hanna .: Milos you fuck
[1:29:16 PM] Zara: Then I guess it's time for a reboot!
[1:29:35 PM] Hanna .: Calebs account was deleted
[1:29:47 PM] Zara: Jesus Christ
[1:29:51 PM] Zara: ALA REBOOT
[1:30:12 PM] Meh: What do you mean by reboot?
[1:30:36 PM] Zara: That shit you do to back up the forum
[1:30:46 PM] Hanna .: He's deleted several accounts and demoted almost everyone
[1:30:55 PM] Hanna .: There has to be something you can do
[1:30:58 PM] Meh: I can't. I don't have a backup.
[1:35:10 PM] Hanna .: Damn
[1:36:26 PM] Meh: Well, I'm going to bed. Goodnight.
[1:37:21 PM] Milos: let it burn.
[1:37:24 PM] Hanna .: Your site is being ruined, boy
[1:37:44 PM] Meh: That's not cool, Milos. Could have waited until after my birthday.
[1:37:47 PM] Meh: But ok...
[1:37:50 PM] Sh ö p ø ke: :l
[1:38:30 PM] Zara: Ala check the group Hanna added you to dude
[1:40:40 PM] Hanna .: Sigh
[2:13:20 PM] Lord Mawhorea, The Destroyer of all Things Living: ooooo BF is dun diddly dead
[2:13:27 PM] Lord Mawhorea, The Destroyer of all Things Living: ...and this is why we don't give admin to fuckasses
[2:13:58 PM] Milos: you didnt have admin fortunately :D
[2:14:14 PM] Lord Mawhorea, The Destroyer of all Things Living: I wouldn't have done this honestly
[2:14:21 PM] Lord Mawhorea, The Destroyer of all Things Living: i would've just triple locked you out
[2:17:10 PM] Meh: I don't exactly see how BF can continue to function: the only people I trust right now are Zen and Hanna and they dislike each other. Kek.

Yes, Lucian actually attempted to place blame on this article when it was actually his own incompetent admins and personal white knights who attempted to destroy his site.

[8:48:24 AM] Arch: I resign
[8:48:45 AM] Caleb: You were already fired idiot
[8:48:52 AM] Arch: Oh stfu
[8:48:56 AM] *** Arch has left ***

Dont touch my perms bitch


—Matt a.k.a. Arch

Update: ArchiveToday-favicon.pngHe's now asking if he should shut down BF.

Discovered by The Drunken Pissants: The Birth of Corpse Midget

The birth of Corpse Midget.

Sometime last Thursday, Lucian's videos were discovered by TheAmazingAtheist (who probably found out about him by reading this fucking article) and were featured on The Drunken Peasants podcast – a series of 300+ videos of TJ and his fat friends rambling on about shit nobody cares about and commenting on stupid fucking YouTube videos for THREE FUCKING HOURS PER-EPISODE.

Following his "discovery" by the Drunken Pissants, Lucian was affectionately given the nickname Corpse Midget and has been features in 5 episodes of their shitty podcast.


Evidence? Excuse me?! Other than the fact that I have an unusual physical appearance, everything she wrote about me are lies. How can there be evidence of anything she wrote about me when it's not true?


—Lucian, suggesting that this article doesn't contain evidence


Lucian's photographic evidence that is supposed to prove that he is actually 5'7".
He's clearly shorter than the average sand person.

Quotes from the paedo himself

Well, whoever feels like they have had enough censorship can leave RR and move to my forums. It's hosted in Europe, where underage nudism is legal.


—Lucian wants you to post pictures of naked little girls

Bitch pls. Men are too tall for me. I can hardly reach women's vaginas.


—Lucian, on why he's not gay

I'm a pedohpile [sic].


—Lucian Hodoboc

One of my moderators is 11, and she does a great job and is very helpful. Age discrimination sucks. People can act responsively and be intelligent regardless of their age.


—He'll be tired of her by the time she turns 12

Hey, EpicLLOYD, you know what you and I have in common? We both played Hitler in one of our videos. Yours was awesome.


—Lucian, on being Hitler

I wasn't lying to be mean to Flik. It was a joke. Seriously, don't you dare compare transexual, which is a valid sexual identity with social rights for which people have fought, to "midget", which is an offensive term banned by several social gorups [sic].


—Lucian falsely accuses a girl of being trans, gets called a midget and then BAWWWs.

Crookie, too bad your mom is not alive anymore to see the sad excuse for a human being she had raised.


—Lucian insults Crookie's dead mom

Oh, look how brave you are on the internet, Mr. I'm Gay Cause I Was Sexually Abused. Can't make fun of people your size, cause they keep raping you? What does Nox stand for? No sex, please, daddy!


—Lucian, being classy

They gossiped about me behind my back in a chat room where I was unfairly banned from. If that doesn't call for justice, then I don't know what does.


—Lucian, on justice

It is our duty to fix unfairness if we are to aspire towards a better society. Also, I would appreciate it if you didn't gossip about my physical appearance behind my back. That kind of shit is low even for you.


—Alakazam being philosophical, then being butthurt

Age is irrelevant, just like skin color and height


—Lucian thinks age is irrelevant

Stating a fact with the intention of harming someone is called bullying.


—Lucian thinks facts are bullying

I hate my life and I want to die.


—Lucian Emoboc

Yeah, I'm having sex on imvu, give me a break.


—Lucian admitting to his bad habits

Today I revealed to my little sister that I'm into incest. She took it pretty hard.



Well, if she is 13, then she needs to see a doctor, because those breasts are abnormally large for anyone under 17 years old.


—Lucian knows how to spot delicious flat chest

Others' opinions about this sick fuck

An autistic, blind, deaf and dumb child with one leg could tell he was a paedophile at a glance. I felt molested just looking at that face.



We all know how ridiculous Ala is. He is an absolute retard and I've said it before but both of his parents had to be siblings.



yeah but alakazam is literally someone who wants to rape children so while you might not have a problem with the dude I certainly do.


—The Iron Rose, on Lucian literally wanting to rape children

Better put bringing criminals to justice on the back burner.

We got bigger fish to fry like gossip and forum bans.


—Crookie, on Lucian's BAWWWtism

Honestly, how dare you bring up Crookie's mother? Your mother should have eaten you at birth, as is custom in Romania when the bitch produces a weak pup.


—Sqkwirl, telling Lucian that he should have been aborted

Alakazam was banned for being a creepy stalker pedo basically.


—Crookie, on why Ala was banned from Ionic Forums


Lucian whines about the unrequited love from another one of his 12-year old crushes

His impression of Leonard F. Shaner Jr.

Lucian pretends to be a loli.

Lucian honours Gary Glitter by telling 40 paedo jokes.

Lucian defends PaedoPie.


[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See Also

If Trevor Phillips was a midget.

External Links

Don't let your kids visit these links!
Maddie may have been a member of Beautiful Forums.

His Shitty Websites

Social Media Accounts

Gay Newfag Accounts

Forum Accounts

Archived Shit

Other Shit

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Lucian Hodoboc is part of a series on YouTube.



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Those Dying Alone

03bgood2cash2 gryphon7jackass77Adam SandlerAngry GrandpaAhuviya HarelAIDS SkrillexAkewsticRockRAlex FordAlison RappAmerica's Third PartyAmy SchumerAngry JoeAnimatedJamesAnita SarkeesianAnonymous BorgAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAntony AguilarApril DavisAquagirlwhitefoxArgent009Arguecat3Arin HansonArmake21AsalieriAsa CoonAsher2500Austin AlexanderAvantGardePonyBambifan101BarneyfagBasement DwellersBen FordBen MoynihanBenny_the_SnakeBenthelooneyBig RedBikerfoxBill9929Bill GaedeBill GatesBLACKbusterCriticBob RehahnBrandontheMovieGuyBrandon SmithBrian MuellerBrian Richard ZaigerBrianna WuBroniesButLovaByAppointmentToCarl the CuckCartoonjunkieCaseydeckerCatboyKamiCheeyevChloe SagalChris-chanChris CrockerChuck M.Clint of Rise and FallCopperCabCorey MargeraCoughlan666CrazyvideosandrantsCrinklemonDaniel BrandtDan CilleyDane CookDani FilthDarius McCollumDarknessthecurseDave ChapelleDave MustaineDavid HockeyDaxflameDBoyWheelerDeekerDeterminedToDrawUTDev-catscratchDGTrixieDiaper BoyDisneyFan01DisneyMasterDJ KEEMSTARDnepropetrovsk maniacsDodgerofZionDogpatch PressDon RobertsDoodletonesDoomer3868Dorian_GayDoug WalkerDragoneerDrakonDustinEmer PrevostEmosEpic Fat GuyEpicKitty54Eric AbramovEric RidenourErik RibsskogErtasVideosFilthy FrankFagolescentsFanFic CriticFast EddieFat ManFaust & Pory Five Nights at Freddy's fansFlardoxFluffy teh wolfForeverKailynFriends of A-LogFurriesG-ZayGather Against FateGeorge LopezGeosheaGhostGirlvinylGlobelampGoddessMilleniaGraykatGreg MazujianGwen GaleGwen StefaniHarmful OpinionsHellkiller777I Dislike Cis PeopleI Hate EverythingIan Miles CheongIchverboticze⁴rImma-The-DeerInkBunnyIsabella Loretta JankeJamil The KingJessi SlaughterJessica LeedsJim ProfitJINXDROWNEDJoe Crusher PicklesJoekerJohn BullaJohn FieldJohn KricfalusiJohn Patrick RogersJonathan McIntoshJonmonJonTronJoseph CampJoseph8276Joshua "Null" MoonJuggalosJustinRPGKaBlamBandicoot64Kat DenningsKendall JennerKeegan SalisburyKathleen ToddKenny GlennKevin HavensKimmo Johan AlmKingEmpoleonKingMasterReviewKrashedLaci GreenLarry the Cable GuyLauren FaustLeafyIsHereLecarickLeigh AlexanderLeisureSuitGamingLena DunhamLeonard F. Shaner Jr.Leslie JonesLifeInATentLikeicareLinkaraLittleCloudLittleKuribohLogo KidsLordelthibarLucian HodobocM. ChaosA Man in BlackManchildrenMar9122MarblesMariotehplumberMarjan SiklicMatthew DavisMatthew NicholsonMaxtaroMcJuggerNuggetsMDetector5‎MeowbarkMeganSpeaksMichael BattonMichael FitzhywelMichael GimsonMike SandyMoleman9000Monica PunkMonkeyGameGuidesMoviebobMuZemikeMylarBalloonFanMysteriousMrEnterMysticArkNaokoElric2250Nathan GaleNawlinWikiNeckbeardsNeoGAFNick BateNick BravoNikkineko333Noah AntwilerNostalgia ChickNotchNullcherriObjectfagsOFWGKTAOnideus Mad HatterOnyx ForepawPacificoceanasiaPaigeGirlPaul FeigPaulie CalafioreParkourdude91Peter BrightPeter CoffinPhantomStrider8Phil FishPhunWithLogicPinkieponyPit ViperPixyteriPMRantsPreachingthegospelQuentin TarantinoRachael MacFarlaneRandi HarperRedheadXilamGuyRicki RavenRMG ProductionsRobert Wayne StilesRockosockoRomeo RoseRootbrianRose3212Sad FrogSammyClassicSonicFanSam PepperSarah ButtsSarahisniftySaturnDOSSceptreSchnookumsSegacampSega KidSeth MacFarlaneSethistoShadmanSimply OkamiSlowbeef & DiabetusSnapesnoggerSonmanicSony-MaeSophie LabelleSpax3StormySuperlisamcbSusan BoyleTara StrongTheAmazingAtheistTheDOSFagTheSockDetectiveTim BuckleyTJ LaneTodd in the ShadowsTom PrestonToonEGuyTourneyfagsTrey Eric SeslerTrigglypuffTyciolTyler GarmanyUlillilliaThe Unknown AutobotVadeVinceintheBayWade FulpWeatherManKevinWesley!!!WoWfan4lifeWwwareaWeegeeisgoingtokillmXenuriaYoshiwii1Youyoungbloodfantasy91Zoe QuinnZone

Their Methods

9gagAdventure TimeAIDSAnimuArt SchoolAsperger's SyndromeAssigned Maleask.fmBath SaltsBattle for Dream IslandThe Big Bang TheoryBlackLivesMatterBlack metalBody PillowsBoozeBullyingBuzzFeedCollectorComputer Science IIICosplayDating simsDead FriendDeath metalDeath penaltyDeviantARTDiscordDrugsEdginessFanFictionFeminismFidget spinnerFive Nights at Freddy'sFleshlightFriend ZoneFun Shitposting WikiFurry ArtGarry's ModGoAnimate!GooglewhackingGorillazGravity FallsGrindcoreHackingHappy Madison ProductionsHomestuck‎Hover hand‎HufflepuffHypebeastInfantilismInsane Clown PosseInvisible GirlfriendIRCJenkemKiwi FarmsKotakuLegoLeague of LegendsLibertarianismLiveJournalLonelyLoveShyMai WaifuMen's rights activismMinecraftMLP ForumsMMORPGsMUDsMy Little PonyMy Tiny DickNice GuyismOculus RiftOh ShiternetOnline datingOnline sex gamesOverwatchPlastic CrapPlenty of Fish/r9k/RobloxRuneScapeSecond LifeSelf-seclusionSilk Screen Goku ShirtTaking the Internet Too SeriouslyShy Boys IRLSilk Screen Goku ShirtSlayerSlipknotSluthateSmogon UniversitySocial JusticeSpeakoniaSuicideTeam Fortress 2That Guy With The GlassesThe SimsThey Might Be GiantsTulpasTumblrTV TropesUncle GrandpaUncyclopediaUndertaleUTTPVloggerheadsWatchMojo.comWizardchanWorld of WarcraftYouTube

Featured article September 3 & 4, 2016
Preceded by
Oompa Loompas
Lucian Hodoboc Succeeded by
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