Have I Got News For You

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Jimmy Somerville from Bronski Beat with Paul Merton.

Have I Got News For You is a satirical britfag television panel show, that is is considered to be one of the greatest bringers of lulz and drama to the British public. Beginning as a cheap piece of shit to undercut Spitting Image's success the show features Paul Merton and Ian Hislop as team captains with a guest host - following the drama surrounding presenter disgraced legendary coke snorting and hooker fucking former-presenter Angus Deayton. The show (that has been running ever since England won the World Cup in 1966) is particularly notable for skirting very close to libel it's slander if they SAY things like princess di was a hooker you bell end laws, and it is a running joke that particularly scurrilous accusations are suffixed with the word "allegedly". Other memes have included the fact that Angus Deayton was fucking Paul Merton's wife, ridiculing the Deputy Prime Minister for being a fat fuck and insisting that Princess Diana and the Duchess of York (amongst other women) are "over-blown tarts".

Because the BBC are not faggots like Viacom, clips from the show are all over YouTube so that Americunts can start to understand that The Daily Show isn't actually that funny.

Cocaine & Hookers = job at BBC

It came as a shock to many, as most people know that surveys have shown that 50% of the BBC are coke addicts, however presenter disgraced legendary former-presenter Angus Deayton was sacked in 2002 when his position became "untenable" after being caught snorting coke and fucking a hooker. In this instance the definition of "untenable" is "(adj): getting trolled liek fuck by everyone on the show". It should be mentioned that the hooker in question hadn't been paid for by Angus Deayton, but was paid for by tabloid journalists as part of a sting operation.

However, this did provide the British public with one of the greatest pieces of television drama the BBC has ever produced. Sadly, it also led to the rise of Boris Johnson - who despite being a very good troll, will probably become became a massively inept mayor of London.

Highlights from the Post-Scandal Show


Since the scandal, a myriad of guest hosts have taken over. Each week, someone different hosts the show. Usually, people like Bill Bailey, Alexander Armstrong, and Jeremy Clarkson host. However, there have been some unforgettable hosts, including Brian Blessed, Alastair Campbell, and William Shatner.

William Shatner sings "Rocket Man".
Brian Blessed demonstrates his vocal range.



Fact of the Day

As part of the Dadaist theatre movement[1], the entire script of "Have I Got News For You" is repeated on BBC Radio with exactly the same jokes under the name "The News Quiz". In a surreal twist the radio version is hosted by Ian Hislop dressed as a woman, whilst Paul Merton warms up the studio audience by tonguing BBC radio announcer Charlotte Green live on stage.

See also

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