Cheeseburger Josh

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A challenger appears
Cheeseburger. You're DOING IT WRONG.
Flawless victory

fuck you and your cheeseburger, motherfucker. I will beat you all over those french fries boi!!!


—Cheeseburger Josh

Cheeseburger Josh, powerword Joshua "Ace" Moll, a fat, wanna-be UFC fighter, just wanted a fucking cheeseburger.

What he got instead was grappled into submission at an Austin, Texas Whataburger restaurant by one Joseph Guichebarou, who already had his fucking cheeseburger and simply wanted to be left alone with his beard and his thoughts to enjoy his meal. Incredibly, this beating actually occurred despite the fact that Josh was protected by the soul crushing power of an authentic TapouT shirt, which we all know immediately brands him an A-1 certified BADASS MOTHERFUCKER and virtually indestructible, thus rendering any real exercise or formal training completely irrelevant.

Josh in 2007
Josh in 2010

The proverbial cherry on top of this EPIC encounter, however, was NOT that our much larger and powerful protagonist was soundly defeated...OH NO...He was also immediately depantsed, revealing his decision that today would be an underwear optional day; the end results of which were that all were exposed to the horrific sight of his pale, flabby, disgusting asscheeks, and Josh's melancholy realization that being a BADASS MOTHERFUCKER was inversely proportional to time spent wearing sandals, getting dry-humped by some guy, flopping around helplessly while half-naked on a dirty floorwhile drunk, and getting laughed at by niggers.

One result of this confrontation was that, to the numerous minorities present, it can serve as both an example of what an actual 1-on-1 fight might look like outside of their natural habitat. However, the true measure of just how the commonly held belief that white people can't fight was either challenged or reinforced by this sociological experiment remains to be seen.

Response Videos

Response from the victor


See Also


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